Ive always felt there was a thread of unfairness in the way my parents treated me. Let me start at the beginning: as a child, I was practically raised by my grandmother because my parents were constantly working hard to provide for us. I remember them dropping me off at Grans house as they dashed off to their jobs. If Im honest, it was Gran who truly brought me up, and Ill be forever grateful for her love and care.
Now that Im a mother myself, with two daughtersEmily and Sophiemy husband and I both work two jobs so we can save up for our own flat. At first, it was a real struggle to juggle everything, but my parents offered to pitch in. Theyd take the girls to nursery, fetch them afterwards, whisk them off to birthday parties or the park, and simply spend time with them.
In short, they basically looked after our children while we slogged away at work. They understood how much we had on our plate and were genuinely willing to help. But then, out of the blue, Mum came to see me one day and said that she and Dad were planning to let out their house and move to a village in the countryside. It was quite a distance from where we lived and the news left me really upset. Mum, could you possibly wait just a few more months before you move? Were so close to saving enough for our own flat. If you go now, Ill have to quit my job and well lose our chance to buy a place this year, I pleaded with her.
Her response was not at all what I expected. Were not staying here just for you. We want to move, and were going to do it. You really ought to learn to manage on your own. You shouldnt always rely on other people; were not obliged to look after your children, Mum replied. I was stunned by her reply, and although I felt hurt, I tried to keep my feelings under control. Deep down I knew that asking them to wait a few extra months wouldnt really change anything for them, so I didnt argue the point any further. I realised that they didnt want to spend more time with my girls, and there was no forcing that. My husband and I are used to taking lifes challenges head on and doing things on our own. Thats what well keep doing.
