I was seeing a man named William. He was a decent person, with old-fashioned values, who truly believed in love. He always walked people to school, fed stray animals, and had undeniable charm. He kept his own flat, drove a nice car, and held a respected position at work.
I considered myself lucky that he chose me to be his wife. At the time, I thought I must be the luckiest woman in England. My friends were jealous and all said in unison, Be careful, dont let a man like him slip away.
So, I tried my best not to lose him, and he held onto me tightly as well. But sadly, my happiness didnt last long.
One day, William came home visibly upset and couldnt bring himself to look me in the eye. I asked him over and over what was wrong. Eventually, he confessed that he had met my ex-husband. Purely by chance, or so it seemed. I should mention, Ive had no contact whatsoever with my ex. I hadnt even shown William a photo, so he had no idea what my ex looked like. So, it became clear to me that it was William who had gone looking for him. But meeting my ex-husband was only the beginning of it.
Suppose it was all just a coincidence and William somehow realised who he was. But it was William who struck up conversation with my ex and the two of them began chatting. They had a cigarette together, and soon enough, the topic turned to me. I had never hidden anything from William, so I was simply baffled as to what they could be discussing about me. Shocked doesn’t begin to describe how I felt. My fiancé later admitted he shouldnt have done it. It turns out William asked my ex-husband about me: what I was like, what my character was, why we split up, and so on.
I burst into tears. It felt like a betrayal, meeting up with my ex to dig for information about me, when Im right there and he could just ask me anything he wants. Is that supposed to be normal? Is that even acceptable? Why, William?
My ex-husband, of course, said all sorts of ridiculous things about me. William then started probing and asking whether what my ex said was true. Why should I have to make excuses for things that never even happened? Someone spouts rubbish and suddenly its my job to justify myself?
Suddenly, I realised I could no longer respect this man. I can almost understand grannies on a park bench, gossiping and having a moan. But theyre old ladieswhat else would you expect? You, however, are a grown man! Why are you going behind my back to gather stories about me? You chose me to be your wife, we live together. I have never given you the slightest reason to doubt me. For me, what he did was so petty and underhanded that any desire to be with him vanished on the spot. There was no excuse for his behaviour. I just couldnt forgive a betrayal like that.
Ive always thought that if someone dared to say a bad word about a blokes other half, the man would be, at the very least, indignant. At worst, hed defend her fiercely. But actively seeking out your fiancées ex just to listen to gossip behind her backnow thats beyond the pale.
Just like that, my perfect fiancé William fell from grace in my eyes. Then I remembered what the older generation used to say: that respect must be at the heart of a family, above all else. I never saw myself as extreme, but male gossipwell, for me thats just a step too far. A man deserves his weaknesses, his tears, his whims, his mistakes, even his clumsy moments. But to behave like an old gossip, to believe every rumournever!
