6th April
I was trudging home from the village shop with bags full to bursting, chatting with my neighbour, Helen. As we neared my little bungalow, I spotted an elegant car parked outside the gate and felt an odd sense of pride.
Oh, that must be my future son-in-law, come bright and early, I announced, chin up and smile on my face.
Helen glanced at the car, an unmistakable glint in her eye.
You already count him as your son-in-law, do you? You know, Ruth hasnt had a proposal yet. And honestly, how much do we know about him? Could be anythinga con artist or even worse
I waved her off, crossing my lips with a tight line.
Dont be ridiculous. Hes a decent man, and hes serious about Ruth. Im in a rushIve got to put the kettle on for our guest, and look, Ive got some nice chocolates for the occasion.
I hoisted my shopping and made for the house, nearly at a jog. Behind me, Helens face twisted in jealousy.
So thats what its all about, I imagined her thinking, All that posh sausage, fancy chocolates, and cheeseshes buttering up the guest, hoping to marry off her daft Ruth as soon as possible.
***
Home at last, I grinned ear to ear. Stepping inside, I saw Ruth perched on a stool, with himour guestjust beside her. He was leaning close, staring into her eyes. The moment I let the front door slam, he straightened and shuffled aside. Ah, they had been gazing at each other, clearly.
He was polite as ever, bringing Ruth flowers, a box of chocolates, and perfume, all beautifully wrapped.
He nearly bowed to me, his prospective mother-in-law. I studied him keenly.
Oh Ruth, hes such a handsome man, I later gushed to my daughter. Just a touch of silver at the templesreally, it suits him, gives him an air of nobility! Like an aristocrat, he is!
Ruth smiled with all the pride in the world.
He is an aristocrat, Mum.
So, what was the occasion? Why the gifts and flowerswas it finally for a proper proposal? I pestered.
Ruths smile faltered.
No, Mum. No proposal. He just wanted to take me out to the theatre in Londona date, thats all.
My own smile faded, replaced by an old suspicion.
Just a date, you say I know the typebig city charmer. Runs wild with London girls, has his fun, and then comes to the country looking for new conquests.
A date Oh, love, I think youve got a Casanova there. Hes been coming for two months, and not a word about getting married!
Mum
What? Youre thirty, arent you? And he must be pushing forty! If marriage isnt on the table by now, hes just stringing you along.
Mum, well sort it out between ourselves!
Stop right there and listen to your mother! I snapped, striding over to snatch the sausage Ruth was nibbling right out of her hand. Put it back, you need to watch your figure! Besides, the sausage cost a fortune, and your gent will be round again for tea tomorrowyoud best save some.
Ruth regarded me with those astonishing blue eyes.
Mum, why are you cross again? Whats wrong this time?
I stuffed the sausage back in the fridge, clattered plates in the sink, and swept away the cheese and chocolates, all with a pointed look at Ruth.
Im scared! I blurted. He comes and goes, the whole village sees him, and one day hell just disappearno proposal, nothing! People are starting to whisper, call you a spinster!
And after this aristocrat, no one else will call at all!
Dont worry, Mum, Ruth replied with a knowing smile. Hes not going anywhere.
***
A week later, there I was, packing Ruths suitcase, dabbing at my eyes. Id thought my daughter was a careful girl, but apparently, Id been wrong.
She was expecting a baby! When I asked how it all happened, she flashed a secretive grin.
Well, he gave me a lift out to the woods to pick blackberries. He waited for me by the edge of the forestjust to bring me back because he liked me so much. You know, I am rather pretty
Hold on in the woods, then? What do you mean? Just you tell me nowwhere did I go wrong in raising you?
Ruth carried on munching sausage and expensive cheese, laughing.
Dont worry about it, Mum! The important thing is, hes asked me to marry him!
Well invite the whole family to the wedding, mind you! I said, sticking to my guns. Oh Ruth, how am I going to let you go, off to the city with a man and a new life! My only girl.
Ill visit you all the time, Mum
Neighbours soon crowded at my door, shouting excitedly.
Valerie, I heard your Ruth is getting married, and you never even told us!
Shes leaving, I raced about packing.
What, and weve no gifts for her? You should have warned us!
No need for presents, Ruths just heading to London with her fiancé.
Oh, what wonderful news!
***
There went my darling girl, my only Ruth, whisked off to London by the man she loved.
Shed ring from time to time, painting a picture of the grand house her future husband owned.
I waited and waited for wedding news but received none.
A month slipped by, then two, then half a year
One morning, Helen came haring up my garden path, all breathless excitement.
I saw Ruth with a pram in London! she exclaimed. I all but fainted.
With a pram? But how?
I barely remember rushing to pack, catching the bus, travelling downthe memory just blurs.
There she was, my granddaughter, and Ruth hadnt told me a thing! Such a secret from her own mother!
I rang Ruth right there, on the station platform. Thank goodness for signal in Londonnone to be had back in our village.
Ruth took her time answering, cancelling my call a few times, which made me even crosser.
Where ARE you? I shouted into the phone, catching a few stares. Im at the station. Come fetch me! And tell me why you never told me I was a grandmother?!
She turned up on her own in a taxi, eyes lowered.
Mum, Im sorry, there just wasnt time to explain. I had a little girlher names Daisy. She looks just like you
And were living in Peters house. Oh, Mum, he has the most lovely house!
Well?
I eyed Ruthmy own traitor childsternly.
Are you ashamed of me? Out with it, Ruth.
She looked ready to bolt.
No, no! Mum, absolutely not! Its a bit tricky, thats all Peter lives with his mother.
All of thisthe house, the carbelong to her. He does as she says and she wont let him marry me!
***
I entered that house determined to sort things out.
What sort of mother is thisher son brings home a pregnant fiancée and she wont let them marry?
I ignored Peter, even my new granddaughter, whom Ruth popped in my armsthe minute I was through the door, I went in search of mother dearest. I found her upstairs, tinkling away on a piano, no less.
I cleared my throat, but she barely glanced my way. Fed up, I snapped the piano lid shut.
Excuse me, she said icily. And you are?
Im Ruths mother! I boomed. Arent you ashamed to be playing piano when baby Daisy needs her sleep?
If you mean Daisy, shes had her nap, muttered the pianist, eyebrow arched. And really, its all a matter of perspective whos disturbing whom!
Shes disturbing you? Theres a solution: move to your own flat and sleep in peace!
And why should I move out of my house?
Because youre in the way of a young family!
Am I? Well, Im not holding them hostage. The doors right there; they can leave anytime.
So you dont care about your grandchild? I snapped.
She looked me up and down with icy disdain.
Valerie, was it? Listen, why should I worry about your daughter and granddaughter when you and Peter are perfectly capable? Ive already given Ruth the most precious thing I ownmy son! And that doesnt seem enough for you, does it? Youd toss me out of my own home? Make no mistakeI can have you thrown out if you start causing trouble. Or send you all packing back to your village!
The shouting drew Peter in, all flustered. He whisked me away to the kitchen for a calming cuppa, while Ruth put baby Daisy down to nap.
***
Tea can calm a stormjust as well. I eyed the old bat across the table with all the venom I could muster.
She sipped her tea, eyeing me smugly.
Youll seeIll outlast you, I thought furiously.
Peter was clearly rattled, shifting about nervously, nudging Ruth under the table, his eyes begging her to talk sense into me.
Ruth finally took me aside, up to Peters study, the old bat busy on the piano upstairs.
Mum, we need a word, Ruth began, shutting the door.
Whats to discuss? I bristled. You havent got anywhere with hershes probably got you all under her thumb.
She isnt my mother-in-law, Mum, Ruth admitted, voice dropping. Shes Peters wife. His one and only wife, actually.
I stared, shell-shocked.
How on earth did that happen? I gasped.
Ruth gave me the saddest look.
Mum, you can see how wealthy Peter is. Well, thats all down to her. He married her twenty years ago, when she was nearly fifty. She never wanted childrennever would. Shes what people call child-free.
I looked around the studygolden wallpaper, velvet curtains, elegant furniture, shelves stacked with books, all of it screaming money, but all, apparently, hers.
All of this is hers, Ruth carried on glumly. When I first moved in, I didnt see it. It was only after arguing with her, thinking she was Peters mum, that Peter told me the truth.
Well, hes a scoundrel! I fumed. Why are you still here, Ruth?
Its simple, Mum. Peter wants a familychildren. She never agreed. He stuck with it for years but finally, she allowed him to take a mistressme. Peter hasnt been with her in years, not properly. Theyve lived as flatmates for ages.
Ive heard enough, I said, making for the door. Pack your things, pick up Daisy, and were going home.
But Ruth just lifted her chin.
Mum, Im not leaving. Im fine here! Ill stay with Peter. One day, hell be free and marry me for real.
Till then, that woman will make you miserable!
So be it, Mum. Its my life, my choice.
Fine. Stay here, living like an understudy, while she wipes her feet on you. Im off homedont expect to see me here again!
***
After that, the days at home passed slowly, empty and grey. News came through neighbours: someone elses daughter married, someone elses grandchild born. Sometimes Id call on Helen, play with her grandson, and ache for Ruth and little Daisy.
At last, I couldnt bear it. I locked up the house and went to London.
I hid behind the gates of their grand house, watching. There, in the garden, my Daisy ran about with two pet poodles, squealing: Granny, Grannybut meaning Peters wife, not me.
My heart flared with jealousy. Shes nothing to that child! I*I*am Granny!
I stepped out of the shadows and marched up to the gates.
***
No one barred me from the house; even the lady of the manor nodded coolly, Theres plenty of room for everyone.
We never argued loudly anymorejust barbed jokes as we worked side by side in the garden or played hide-and-seek with Daisy.
You turned up, did you? Scared I was mistreating your Ruth? shed call, weeds thudding in her bucket. Good job you didyour daughters soft, needs protecting from me.
I could kick all of you out whenever I wantor not. Your Ruth, now, shes nothing like you, probably takes after her father. Youve a bit of spark, even if its faint.
Ill smack you with this cloth in a minute, never mind who owns the house. And why faint? I reckon Im stronger than you!
Youre here, not Ruth at yours. If you stood your ground, shed be home now. But youre here, so youre the weak one.
No, Im tougher than you! I only came to stay because youre looking peakyone of these days youll be laid up, and someonell have to fetch your commode. I dont mind, out of family duty. Just so its not Ruths job, mind!
She cackled. Oh, dont worryIm in marvellous health. I eat well, have the best doctors, and never had the stress of children, like you. Whered you get the idea Ill pop my clogs first, Valerie?
And heres what Ive learned: Life never plays out as you hope, especially with children. You cant plan their happiness, and you certainly cant force it. All thats left is to love themno matter if they call someone else Granny, or live in someone elses house. Im still their family, and thats enough.
