MOTHER-IN-LAW
Margaret Allen sat alone in the kitchen, watching the milk quietly simmer on the hob. Three times shed forgotten to give it a stir, and each time shed caught it too late: the froth would rise and spill over, and shed mop it up with annoyance, realising, in those moments, that it wasnt really the milk that was the problem.
Since her second grandchild had arrived, the family seemed to have fallen off the rails. Her daughter had grown exhausted, thinner, and more withdrawn. Her son-in-law returned late from work, ate in silence, sometimes disappearing straight to their room. Margaret saw it all and thought: how can they possibly expect her to manage alone?
She tried to help. At first, gently; then, more bluntlyfirst speaking to her daughter, then to her son-in-law. But a strange thing happened: with every word she spoke, the air in the house grew heavier, not lighter. Her daughter started defending her husband, her son-in-law withdrew, and Margaret, every time she went home, was left with the nagging sense that shed once again got everything wrong.
One day, overwhelmed by it all, she went to see the local vicarnot for advice, but simply because she had nowhere else to turn with her feelings.
I must be dreadful, she admitted, keeping her eyes lowered. Everything I do seems wrong.
The vicar, busy with something at his desk, set aside his pen.
What makes you say that?
Margaret shrugged. I only wanted to help. But all I seem to do is make things worse.
He watched her kindly, not judgmental at all. Youre not dreadful. Youre simply worn outand deeply worried.
She exhaled; it sounded close to the truth.
Im frightened for my daughter, she confessed. Shes just not herself after the birth. And he she waved a hand dismissivelyacts like he doesnt notice.
And have you noticed what *he* does? the vicar asked gently.
She paused, thinking back to the previous week when hed washed up quietly late at night, believing no one saw him. Or the Sunday hed taken the baby for a walk, although he looked ready to drop from exhaustion.
He does things, she admitted, but not too certain. Only not the things I think he should.
How should it be done, then? he asked, calm as anything.
Margaret wanted to answer at once, but realised she didnt know. Only that she wanted more, more often, and with more attention. But what more meant exactly, she couldnt quite say.
I just want it to be easier for her, she said in a small voice.
Say that to yourself, the vicar said quietly. Not to him. To yourself.
She looked up, puzzled. What do you mean?
I mean youre not fighting for your daughterbut with her husband. And fighting, being constantly braced for battlethat wears everyone out. You, them, all of you.
She sat in silence for a long while, then asked, So what am I supposed to do? Pretend everythings fine?
No, said the vicar. Just do what truly helps. Not talk, but actions. Not against anyone, but for someone.
On the way home, Margaret let those words roll around her mind. She remembered how, when her daughter was little, she didnt give lectures when the girl cried. She simply sat close by, wordless. Why is it so different now?
The next day, she turned up at their house unannounced, carrying a pot of homemade soup. Her daughter looked surprised, her son-in-law awkward.
I wont stay long, Margaret said softly. Just thought Id lend a hand.
She looked after the children while her daughter napped. Then she slipped away quietly, leaving without a speech about how hard things were or how they ought to live.
A week later, she did the same. And again, the next week.
She still noticed her son-in-law was far from perfect. But she started to see other things too: the way he picked up the baby gently, how he tucked a blanket over her daughter in the evenings, thinking nobody noticed.
One evening in the kitchen, she couldnt keep it in anymore and asked him, Is this a tough time for you?
He looked startled, as if nobody had ever asked. Yes, he admitted after a pause. Really tough.
That was all they said, but the sharpness that hung in the air between them seemed to melt away.
Margaret came to realise: all this time, shed wanted him to become someone else. Really, she needed to start with herself.
She no longer picked over his failings with her daughter. When her daughter complained, she didnt say I told you so. She just listened. Sometimes, shed collect the children to give her daughter a break. Occasionally, shed give her son-in-law a ring just to check on him. None of it came easilybeing angry was always simpler.
But little by little, the house grew quieter. Not perfect, not even better in any obvious wayjust, blessedly, quieter. The knot of tension loosened.
One day, her daughter said to her, Mum, thank you for being with us now, not against us.
Margaret mulled over those words for ages.
She came to an ordinary but great truth: peace isnt about someone in the family admitting fault. Its about someone taking the first step to stop fighting.
She still wished her son-in-law was more attentive. That never left. But now, beside that longing lived another, more important wish: for peace in the family.
And whenever those old feelings reared upthe urge to criticise, to take offence, to get sharpshed pause and ask herself: Do I want to be right, or do I want to make it easier for them?
Almost always, that question showed her what to do next.












