Get out! bellowed Barry.
You son, what are you his mother began, hauling herself upright, clutching the edge of the table.
Im not your son! Barry snatched her handbag and flung it out into the hallway. Dont you dare set foot here again!
Maria shuddered. In all six years, shed never heard him yell like that.
You son, his mother quavered, desperate and feeble, still gripping the table.
Im not your son! Barry repeated, tossing her bag down the dark corridor. Dont even leave your shadow here!
Little Annie slept with her arms flung wide, like a baby starfish washed up from the Channel. Maria tucked the duvet tighter around her.
She lingered there, gazing at her tiny daughter. All those years dreaming of her, all that effort, all those soft prayers to become a mother.
This was when Barry returned from his night shiftshe recognised the rustle of his boots in the hallway. Maria left the nursery, gently closing the door. Barry kicked off his shoes.
He looked tired, gaunt. Hed been working like a horse to pay off all the loans theyd taken for the rounds of IVF.
She sleeping? he whispered.
Shes asleep. Had supper and nodded off straight after.
Barry pulled Maria close, pressing his face to her neck. He had never been one for sweet talk, but she knew he was grateful to a degree bordering madness.
Grateful that she hadnt left him. Grateful she hadnt swapped him for someone whole. Grateful shed made him happy.
When Barry was sixteen, hed suffered through the mumps but, embarrassed, he hadnt told his mother, too ashamed to mention the swelling and pain.
When he finally confessed, it was too late. The mumps left him almost completely sterile.
Mum rang, Barry murmured, still clinging to Maria.
Maria stiffened.
And what does Mrs. Edith want?
Shes coming, says shell be here by lunch. Baked up some pies, she misses me.
Maria sighed, wriggling out of his grasp.
Barry, perhaps she shouldnt. Last time, she drove me to hysterics with her advice about douching with baking soda.
Maria, its Mum She wants to see her granddaughter. Its been a year, and shes only ever seen Annie in photos. She is a grandmother, after all.
Grandmother Marias smile was bitter. The one who calls Annie that brat.
Theyd adopted Annie a year earlier. The queue for a healthy newborn in their part of England was long enough to go grey while waiting.
What helped was some connections, a brown envelope with a generous amountfor the wards needsand the wise steering of a friendly midwife.
The girls birth mother was a scared, clumsy teen, sixteen and panicky, for whom a baby would bring ruin.
Maria remembered the day: a tiny bundle, weighing seven pounds, with sapphire-blue eyes peering out.
All right, Maria turned. She can come. Well survive. But if she starts again
She wont, Barry promised. Honestly.
Edith arrived for lunch. Mrs. Edith bustled into the flat, overwhelming the space with her presence.
She was a large, booming woman, with the sturdy country hands that could halt a runaway horse or clear out an old farmhouse, not to mention drive everyone mad in the process.
Oh, dearie me! she wailed at the door, thumping down her tartan bag. Getting herehorrible! The overground stank, the Tube was packed to bursting.
And why are you living so high up? The lift groans and shakes, I thought I was about to meet my Maker!
Hello, Mum, Barry pecked her cheek, lifting her heavy bag. Come in, wash your hands.
Edith shrugged off her coat, revealing a flowery dress stretched across her solid frame, and fixed her sharp eyes on Maria.
She surveyed Maria from head to toe, appraising her as if she were a nag at a horse fair.
Hello, Mrs. Edith, Maria smiled.
Hello there, Edith pursed her lips. Youve gone quite see-through. Only bones left. Whats your husband supposed to hold onto?
And I see Barrys lost weight. You dont feed him right? Are you living off grass, starving your man?
Barry eats perfectly well, Maria snapped, her cheeks glowing crimson. Please, join us at the table.
In the kitchen, Edith opened her bag and produced containers of sausage rolls, a jar of pickled onions, a slab of lard.
There you are, eat up. This citys full of chemicals. You chew nothing but plastic here.
She sat with a loud thump, propping her elbows on the worktop.
So, go on then. Hows life? Have you finished with all those experiments?
Maria gripped her fork. Experiments! So that was her name for six years of pain, hope and heartbreak.
Nearly, Mum, Barry grunted, serving himself salad. Lets not talk money.
What else then? Edith bit into a sausage roll. The weather? Back in our village, at your Uncle Colins, hes had a third girl.
Healthy child, beautiful! Nine pounds! And your sister Tessas carrying twins now. Thats what I call breeding!
Our lot are strong, Barry. Fruitful. She gave Maria a meaningful look.
Thats if you dont muck up the genes
Maria laid her fork down slowly.
Mrs. Edith, weve discussed this so many times. It isnt me. The medical report is clear.
Oh, dont be daft! Edith waved dismissively. Doctors scribble those bits of paper to rob you blind. The mumps what nonsense!
Half our village boys had it, and every one of thems got a houseful.
Its your wife, Barry, filling your head with fairy stories to cover up her own problems.
Mum! Barry snapped, striking the table with his palm. Enough!
Edith clutched her heart dramatically.
Dont raise your voice to your own mother! I raised five, I know life. I can seeshes all narrow, childs hips. Where do you expect children to come from? Shes all bloom, no fruit.
Were happy, Mum, Barry said quietly. Weve got our daughter Annie.
A daughter Edith snorted. Show me her, then.
They entered the nursery. Annie had woken and sat in her cot, fingers dancing over a plush teddy bear.
When she saw the unfamiliar woman, she frowned but didnt cry. She was remarkably serene, even now.
Edith went to the cot. Maria stood beside her, ready to snatch her daughter awayone could expect anything from Edith.
Edith stared long at Annie, squinting. Then, she reached out and touched the soft cheek. Annie pulled away.
And who does she take after? Edith grumbled. Those eyes, black as pitch. Our familys all blue-eyed.
Her eyes are dark blue, Maria corrected.
And the nose? All upturned. Yours is sharp, Barrys straight. And hers?
Edith straightened herself, dusted her hands off as if shed touched something sticky.
Shes not our stock, just as I thought!
They returned to the kitchen. Barry poured himself some water, hands trembling.
Mum, listen, he began, attempting softness. We love Annie! Shes ours! On paper, in our heartsevery way.
And well try again for more. The doctors say theres a chance, slim but there. But even if notwere already a family.
Edith sat pinched and rigid. It seemed to pain her physically, this mother of five, grandmother of twelve, watching her son waste his life on anothers child.
Soft as you like, Barry, she finally exhaled. Thirty-five, in your prime. And here you are, coddling some throwaway!
Dont you dare call her that! Maria cried.
What else should I call her? Edith wheeled around, fists balled. Princess?
You ought to hush! Couldn’t have your own, fooled your husband, bribed someone Bought her like a kitten at market!
Shes our child!
A child is yours only when youve done the workup all night, suffered sickness, given birth in pain!
And this She waved vaguely at the nursery. Just playing mums and daughters. You took whatever came. From some wayward teenager.
Think you can chop up genetics with an axe? Wait till she grows upyoull see trouble. Just send her away while you can!
Maria saw Barrys pupils widen. He rose, slowly.
Out, he said softly.
Edith stared, bewildered.
What?
Get out, now! Barry screamed.
Maria flinched. Shed never heard him shout like that in six years.
You son, Edith tried, pulling herself upright with the tables edge.
Im not your son! Barry grabbed her bag and hurled it into the corridor. Get out! You want us to give Annie away? Give away a child?
Youre mixing up people and things! Shes my daughter! Mine! And you youre
He was struggling for breath.
Youre a monster, not a mother! Go back to your little village, count your bred kids. Dont ever meddle with us again! Never!
The baby wailed from the nursery. Maria darted for the door, but stopped, watching Ediths face changethe red drained out to a muddy grey.
Ediths mouth fell open, gasping like a trout chucked onto the pier. Her hand, clutching her heart, scrunched up her dress.
Barry she croaked. It burns Oh, it burns
Her body slumped, heavy as a sack of spuds, knocking the kitchen chair skittering. The crash mingled with the babys sobs.
Maria dialled 999. Barry knelt beside his mother, fingers shaking as he fumbled at her collar.
Mum, whats wrong? Mum, breathe!
Edith wheezed.
Paramedics arrived quickly. The medic thundered in:
Heart attack! Big one! Stretcher, quick!
As the front door closed behind them, Barry slumped on the hallway floor, back pressed to the wall. He stared at the handkerchief Edith had left behind on a side table.
Did I do this to her? he asked.
Maria sat next to him, taking his icy hand.
No. She did this herself. She choked on her own fury.
But shes my mother, Maria.
She suggested we throw our daughter out like broken goods. Barry, wake up! You protected your family.
His mobile began to buzz after an hour. It was his sister, Tessa. Then his brother Colin rang. Barry ignored them.
Later a message arrived from his aunt:
Mums in intensive care. Doctors say theres little hope. Youve destroyed her, monster. May you be cursed forever! Stay away!
Well, thats that. Im not family anymore.
Maria hugged his shoulders, feeling the fine tremors running through his body.
You are, she said, firm and sound. You have me. You have Annie. Were your family! Real family. The sort that never betrays.
She stood and tugged him to his feet.
Come on. Annie needs feeding. Shes frightened.
That evening, they sat in the kitchen. Annie played quietly with wooden blocks on the rug by their feet, calmer now. Barry gazed at her as if seeing her for the first time.
You know, he said suddenly, Mum was right about one thing.
Maria tensed.
What?
You cant rub out genes with your finger. But genes arent just colours and shapes. Theyre about whether you can love.
Mum has five kids, but as much love in her as a lump of granite. Maybe I was adopted? Because, look at me, I know how to love Dont I, little one?
He stooped and lifted Annie onto his lap. The little girl grabbed his nose and squealed.
Daddy, she said, clear as a bell.
For the very first time. Until then, just a hazy ba-ba or ma-ma.
Barry froze. The tearslike rain hed been holding back all dayslipped down, puddling on Annies pink onesie.
Daddy, he repeated. Yes, love. Im Daddy. And no one will ever take you away.
His mother recovered, but Barry never spoke to her again. The family branded him as outcast number one.
Maria hesitated to admit it aloud, but secretly she felt only relief. Life, without the barbs and wounds, was so much simpler.
Why cling to family whod happily see you ruined? They were better off without.
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