The wedding was only a week away when she told me she didnt want to get married. Everything had already been paid for the venue, the paperwork, the rings, even a portion of the family celebration. Id been planning it all for months.
Throughout our relationship, I believed I was doing the right thing. I worked full-time and, every month, set aside about 20% of my wages for her for her trips to the salon, manicures, or whatever she fancied. It wasnt because she didnt have a job of her ownshe did, and spent her income as she pleased. I took care of most expenses because, as a man and her partner, I thought it was my duty. I never asked her for money towards the bills. I paid for our nights out, restaurants, cinema trips, weekends awaythe lot.
A year before the wedding, I did something bigI suggested we take her entire family to the seaside. Not just her parents and siblings, but her nieces, nephews, even two cousins. There were a lot of us. To make it happen, I worked extra hours, stopped buying things for myself, and saved up for months. When we finally went, I paid for the accommodation, the travel, the foodeverything. She was over the moon, her family was grateful. No one realised that it all meant nothing to her.
When she told me she wanted to end things, she explained that I was too much. That I wanted more affection, attention, and closeness than she could give. That I wanted to hold her, to text her, to know how she was. She said shed always been reserved, and claimed I smothered her. I was expecting things she simply couldnt provide.
She also told me something shed never mentioned before that shed never really wanted to get married at all. Shed accepted my proposal because Id been so insistent. That by involving her parents, Id cornered her. Id asked her in a restaurant, in front of her family. For me, it was a romantic gesture; for her, it was a trap. She said she didnt feel able to say no in front of everyone.
Five days before we were due at the registry office, with everything arranged, she decided to tell me the truth. She explained that she felt like I was forcing a life on her that she didnt want. That Id done too much, and it made her feel awkward, indebted, and trapped. That shed rather walk away than pretend to go along with something that didnt feel right.
After that talk, she left. There was no shouting, no final embrace, no attempt to patch things up. Just contracts, paid bills, plans made and one cancelled wedding. She stood by her decision, and that was where it ended.
That was the week when I learned that being the man who pays for everything, solves every problem, and is always there is no guarantee that someone will want to stay with you. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is listen, and remember that love cannot be forced or boughtit must be chosen, freely and truly.
