My Father-in-Law Thought We’d Keep Supporting Him Forever: How My Husband’s Widowed Dad Ended Up Living With Us for 11 Years and Still Refuses to Move On

Author Emily TaylorReading 2 minViews 1

My father-in-law always assumed we would continue supporting him.

My husband grew up in a warm and loving family. But sadly, when his father was 57, his wife passed away. Of course, it was immensely difficult for my father-in-law to cope with such a loss. So we decided to sell his flat, split the money, and invite him to live with us until he managed to get through his grief. It seemed like the sensible thing to do.

We thought hed stay with us for about six months, and then buy his own place. But that never happened. He thoroughly enjoyed living with us. He didnt contribute a penny towards bills or food shopping. I cooked for him, washed his clothes, and kept his room tidy. All he did was go to work. His routine felt like a permanent holiday.

He lived this way with us for eleven years. Eventually, he started constantly lecturing us on what to do and how to do it, creating his own rules in our home. We got fed up. So we decided to buy him a house just outside the city. Hes healthy, still in his prime, and perfectly able to live on his own.

We bought him a house and made sure everything was ready for him. Now, my father-in-law has started making up stories about heart problems and other ailments. Its just an excuse to come back and stay with us. But I simply cant do it anymore. All I want is to finally relax and just be with my immediate family. Im exhausted. What should I do?

Raw Nerves… In this family, everyone lived their own separate lives. Dad, Alex, had more than just his wife; he often had a string of lovers. Mum, Jenny, long suspecting her husband’s affairs, was hardly a paragon of virtue herself—she preferred her evenings with a married colleague from work. Their two sons, left to their own devices, wandered aimlessly as neither parent took much interest in raising them. Jenny insisted the school should take full responsibility for her boys. The only time the family gathered together was for a silent, rushed Sunday lunch in the kitchen, each eager to slip away to their own worlds. That’s how this broken, sinful, yet oddly sweet family might have carried on—if not for a tragedy that changed everything. When the younger son, Dennis, was twelve, Alex took him to the garage as an assistant for the first time. While Dennis fiddled with tools, his dad nipped off to see some motoring mates nearby. Suddenly, thick plumes of black smoke and flames billowed from Alex’s garage. No one understood what happened at first. (It would later come out that Dennis had accidentally dropped a lit blowtorch onto a canister of petrol.) People froze, confused. The fire raged. After someone doused Alex with a bucket of water, he rushed into the inferno. Moments later, he emerged carrying his unconscious, burned son—only Dennis’s face was spared, likely shielded by his hands. The boy’s clothes had been burned away. Emergency services arrived. Dennis was alive, but barely. He was rushed into surgery. After agonising hours, the doctor told Alex and Jenny, “We’re doing everything humanly possible. Your son’s in a coma—his odds are a million to one. Medicine can’t help, but if Dennis has the will to live, perhaps a miracle. Take heart.” Desperate, Alex and Jenny dashed to the nearest church—drenched in a downpour and oblivious to everything except saving their son. For the first time in their lives, they stepped into a church. The vicar, Father Samuel, greeted them. “What’s the matter, my children?” “Our son is dying! What should we do?” sobbed Jenny. Father Samuel replied, “Strange how we turn to God only in trouble, eh? Are you greatly burdened by sin?” “Not really… We’ve not killed anyone,” Alex muttered, lowering his eyes. “But you’ve murdered your love—left it dead between you. You could lay a whole cedar plank between husband and wife and neither of you would notice!” Father Samuel admonished. “Pray to St. Nicholas for your son’s health. Pray fervently. But remember—it’s God’s will. God sometimes wakes the lost this way. Otherwise, you’d never understand. Only love can save.” Soaked and weeping, Alex and Jenny listened to the bitter truth about themselves. Before the icon of St. Nicholas, they knelt, prayed desperately, and made vows. All affairs were abandoned and erased. Their lives were pieced back together, bit by bit. The next morning, the doctor rang with astonishing news—Dennis had come out of his coma. Alex and Jenny sat by his bedside as the boy, eyes open and in pain, whispered, “Mum, Dad. Don’t separate, please.” “We’re together, darling,” insisted Jenny, gently touching his limp hand. Dennis winced. “I saw it, Mum! And, my children will have your names,” the boy went on. His parents exchanged looks, assuming he was delirious—what children? Dennis was bedridden, barely able to move. But from then on, Dennis slowly improved. All family resources went into his care—Alex and Jenny even sold the summer cottage. The garage and car had burned, but the boy survived. Grandparents helped however they could. Adversity brought the family together. Even the longest day has an end. A year passed. Dennis, in a rehabilitation centre, could walk and look after himself. There, he befriended Maddy, a girl his age also injured by fire—her face terribly burned. After numerous surgeries, she was too shy to look at herself in a mirror. Dennis felt a deep warmth towards her—Maddy exuded a wisdom and innocence that drew him in. They became inseparable, sharing time and confiding in one another. Both had endured agony, despair, and the daily routine of hospitals. Time ticked on… Dennis and Maddy celebrated a modest wedding. The couple had beautiful children: first a daughter, Charlotte, then three years later a son, Eugene. At last, when the family could breathe easy, Alex and Jenny made a decision—to separate. Dennis’s ordeal had exhausted them to the core; they could no longer be together. Each craved peace and freedom from the other. Jenny moved in with her sister in the suburbs. Before leaving, she sought Father Samuel’s blessing—he had often guided her since Dennis’s trauma, always correcting her: “Thank God, Jenny!” Father Samuel disapproved of her departure, saying, “If you must, go and rest, but come back. Husband and wife are meant to be together.” Alex stayed alone in the empty flat. The boys, both with families of their own, lived elsewhere. Former spouses visited grandchildren in turn, carefully avoiding each other. And so, everyone finally found their own kind of peace…

02

I’ll Remind You – Mrs. Mary Edwards, This Swirl Won’t Work, Murmured a Sad Year 2 Student, Tommy, Pointing His Brush at the Stubborn Green Petal Curl on His Painted Flower. “Ease Up on the Brush, Darling… That’s It—Glide It as Softly as a Feather on Your Palm. Beautiful! Not Just Any Swirl—A Masterpiece!” Smiled the Elderly Teacher. “Who’s the Lucky Recipient of Your Lovely Painting?” “It’s for Mum!” Tommy Beamed, Triumphant After Fixing the Petal. “It’s Her Birthday, and This Is My Gift!”—His Pride Swelling Under the Teacher’s Praise. “Your Mum’s a Lucky Lady, Tom. Let the Paint Dry Before You Rip the Page Out—She’ll Love It!” Mrs. Edwards Glanced Fondly at Tommy’s Bent-Over Head, Thinking to Call His Mum and Suggest Art School—Such Talents Shouldn’t Go to Waste, and She Could Ask If the Gift Was Well Received… Mrs. Edwards Couldn’t Tear Her Eyes from the Living, Spiraling Leaves and Recalled How Tom Had His Mother’s Artistic Gift—Larissa Drew Beautifully at His Age… But That Evening, a Phone Call: “Mrs. Edwards, It’s Larissa, Tommy Carter’s Mum—I’m Phoning to Say He Won’t Be In Tomorrow,” Came the Stern Voice. “Is Something Wrong?” “You Could Say That! He Ruined My Birthday—Now He’s in Bed with a Fever, and the Ambulance Only Just Left.” “But He Was Fine at School—He Had Your Gift…” “You Mean That Mess?” “What Mess, Larissa! They Were Flowers! I Was Going to Recommend Art School…” “All I Saw Was a Mucky Smudge, Not Quite What I Expected!” Mrs. Edwards Grew Increasingly Concerned, Listening to Larissa’s Frazzled Explanation, Finally Suggesting She Call Round—She Lived Nearby… Minutes Later, With Her Former Student’s Permission, Mrs. Edwards Grabbed a Bulging Old Photo Album of Her First, Beloved Class, and Set Off. In Larissa’s Chaotic Kitchen, Amidst Dirty Dishes and a Half-Eaten Cake, She Learned the Whole Sorry Story—How Tommy Came Home Late, Muddy and Soaked, With a Shivering Puppy He’d Rescued from Bullies Dumping It in a Thawing Ditch, How His Books Were Ruined, His Folder Smudged, and How He Soon Came Down with a High Fever… How the Birthday Guests Left Unserved, and the Paramedic Told Her Off for Neglect… “I Took the Puppy Back to the Dump When Tommy Fell Asleep. The Album’s Drying on the Radiator—There Isn’t Much Left after That Soaking!” Larissa Scoffed, Unnerved by Mrs. Edwards Growing Grim. When She Heard the Fate of the Rescued Pup, Mrs. Edwards Turned As Stern as Thunder, Stroked the Ruined Album, and Spoke Softly of Spiraling Green Leaves, of Flowers Come Alive, of Courage Unbecoming a Child, of Injustice, and of Bullies Who’d Thrown a Defenseless Animal Away… She Led Larissa to the Window: “See That Ditch There? Not Only Could That Puppy Have Drowned—So Could Tommy. All He Was Thinking About Was Not Ruining the Flowers He’d Painted for You. Have You Forgotten, Larissa, How You Cried on That Playground Bench, Clutching a Scruffy Kitten You’d Saved from the Local Yobs, Waiting for Your Mum?” She Showed a Faded Photo of a Delicate Girl in a White Pinafore Hugging a Fluffy Kitten, Smiling at Her Gathered Classmates, and Quietly Reminded Her of the Kindness That, Once Upon a Time, Bloomed Brightly in Larissa’s Own Heart. Out Tumbled a Old Child’s Drawing—A Little Girl Holding a Kitten With One Hand, Clutching Her Mum’s Hand With the Other… “If I Had My Way,” Mrs. Edwards Continued Firmly, “I’d Kiss That Puppy and Tommy Both, and Frame Those Colourful Smudges! There’s No Better Gift for a Mother Than to Raise a True Human Being!” Unseen, Her Words Broke Through. Larissa Kept Glancing Toward Tommy’s Closed Door, Clutching the Damp Album With White Knuckles… Then, Suddenly: “Mrs. Edwards! Please, Would You Watch Tommy for Just a Moment? I’ll Be Quick—Just a Minute!” Coat Hurriedly Thrown On, Larissa Rushed Out, Not Caring About Wet Shoes or Mud, Calling and Searching at the Dump for That Tiny Puppy—Glancing Back Anxiously at Home… Would Tommy Forgive Her? ***** “Tom, Who’s That Burying His Nose in the Flowers? Is That Your Pal—Digger?” “That’s Him, Mrs. Edwards! See the White Star on His Paw? Mum Bought a Special Little Tub to Wash Him—She Says If You Have a Friend, Look After Him!” “You’ve Got a Wonderful Mum,” Mrs. Edwards Smiled. “Drawing Her Another Picture?” “Yep—This Time for a Frame! She’s Got Those Smudges Framed and Smiles at Them—But, Mrs. Edwards, Can You Really Smile at Smudges?” “Maybe You Can… If They’re from the Heart. Tell Me, How’s Art School Going?” “Brilliant! Soon I’ll Paint Mum’s Portrait—She’ll Love That! Meanwhile—Look!” Tommy Pulled Out A Folded Sheet: “This Is From Mum—She Draws Too, Now!” Mrs. Edwards Unfolded the Paper and Squeezed Tommy’s Shoulder. On the White Page, Splashed in Bright Colours, Smiled a Radiant Tommy, His Hand on the Head of a Loyal, Loving Mutt. Next to Them, a Tiny Blonde Girl in a School Pinafore Cuddled a Kitten… and from Behind a Book-Laden Teacher’s Desk Smiled Mrs. Edwards Herself, Her Eyes Full of Endless Wisdom. In Every Line and Brushstroke, Mrs. Edwards Felt the Unspoken, Boundless Pride of a Mother. With a Tearful Smile, She Noticed In the Corner of the Drawing, Entwined in Flowering Curls and Green Swirls, a Single Word: “Remember.”

01

Divorce Because of the Woman Next Door – Just explain to me, why out of all the women in the world did you choose her? From me—to her, why? Karina was losing to Masha on every front. And it would have been one thing if Valery had said something like, “She’s fun, easy-going, not as strict, not as much of a bore as you.” “How could this happen, Masha? How? You two were so happy…” mourned her mother, her sister, and all her friends when they heard about the coming divorce. “We were,” Maria would agree. “But we won’t be anymore.” “Masha, think thirty times before you leave a man like him. He earns money, loves his kids, and he doesn’t even want the divorce…” And after that, anyone who uttered those words was promptly banished by Maria—blocked for life on social media, messengers, and of course, in real life too. A colleague who used to chat with Maria as a friend now just got a nod and a routine “hello” in passing. And when this colleague tried to reignite their friendship, Maria let her have it—for the unsolicited advice and for all but forcing her to return to her cheating husband. Yes, cheating! Masha still couldn’t wrap her head around it. Everything was fine! Twenty years together, since university—they’d been through a lorry-load of salt, as the saying goes, which is how you know a marriage can last. They’d weathered poverty, unemployment, illness—both their own and the kids’… They had two kids, a son and a daughter—a perfect family, as they say. The house was always spotless, dinner always made, and Masha never had a headache… She looked after herself, never treated her husband like a walking cash machine, always found time for him, and didn’t abandon poor Valery after the kids arrived… So what more could that philanderer possibly want that he suddenly decided to stray? And with whom! If he’d been drawn to a younger woman, at least that would have made some sense. But no—either his heart, or rather, his other head, led Valery to a divorced woman with a child who lived practically next door. “Just tell me, what did you see in her?” Masha alternated between laughter and tears after the affair came to light, and Valery had to answer for his actions. “Why her, of all the women in the world? Why her instead of me?” Karina lost to Masha on every count. And Valery didn’t even offer any character traits like “she’s more fun, more free, less uptight than you…” Nope. Not even that. Was he drunk when it started? Nope, stone-cold sober. All he could do was bleat, “It just happened,” and beg, humiliated, to be allowed back into the family. Suddenly, and not as planned, Valery saw his hopes dashed: he’d thought, like a naughty cat, he could have fun on the side and then innocently waltz back home, crawl into bed with his wife, and pretend nothing ever happened. And maybe that’s exactly what would have happened—if only his new lover hadn’t gotten pregnant, and then decided to drag him off to the registry office to serve as daddy for both her new baby and the first one. She stormed around to Maria’s, scandal in tow. Maria didn’t believe it at first. How could she? After twenty years with a man you think you know inside out! But Karina knew things, as it turned out—like birthmarks, scars, and shapes you can’t just invent. Clearly, the affair was real. Cornered, Valery had no option but to confess and beg forgiveness. Unexpectedly, some friends took his side. Not even mutual friends—her colleague from work, a few girlfriends who’d always treated Valery like a nonentity, even distant relatives… All insisted Maria should forgive and stick with Valery, pretending nothing happened. Maria just couldn’t understand it. Sure, her mother-in-law pleaded for her to “save the family.” At least that made some sense—her son was sorry, and she wanted to help fix things for his sake. She even went so far as to get the kids to beg their mum to stay with their dad. Gross, manipulative—but at least there was a logic. But why did everyone else care so much about Maria’s choice? Was it pure crab bucket mentality: “We’re all sitting in a pile of it, so you’d better sit with us”? Maria didn’t know. But one thing was certain—she refused to put up with it. She was her father’s daughter, after all. He’d taught her one thing above all: if people shame you into sacrificing or forgiving just because “that’s what people do” or “God says so”—don’t believe it for a second. That’s just people trying to exploit you for their own comfort. Maria remembered her dad’s words well, and sure enough, she recognized shaming, guilt-tripping, and obligation-laden manipulation for exactly what it was. And she wasn’t having any of it. Nor were her children, it turned out: after Maria filed for divorce, her mother-in-law called, demanding the children unblock her and stay in touch. “She’s driving us mad,” explained her daughter, Ksenia, at dinner. Her son Victor was staying with his girlfriend, so it was left to Ksenia to explain: “All Grandma ever talks about is trying to get you and Dad back together. I said once—let you two sort it out—but she went on and on, so I just blocked her until she can be a normal grandma again.” “Thank you. I know you probably don’t like what’s going on, and I appreciate that you’re not giving in to her or joining her manipulations.” “Mum, I’m not stupid,” Ksenia sighed. “I know what Dad did. If you two had just argued about holidays or curtains, that’s one thing. But cheating? Normal people don’t forgive that. And Dad knew it too. So what did he expect? What does Grandma expect now?” Maria had no answer. Just a month before, she’d have said she could answer any question from her daughter. But how do you answer, when you don’t even know yourself? How can you explain why the man everyone thought was a model husband and father for twenty years would suddenly go off the rails so spectacularly? Sure, things happen—but nothing like this. Was it a midlife crisis? Was there really another demon inside him? And with that, Valery chose to unleash those demons on his “ex-family” in a most extraordinary way—five years after the divorce. Divorce Because of the Woman Next Door

05

📌 Useful Social Services & Contacts in the U.S.

Stay informed and get help when you need it. Below are key national services with direct contacts that may support you or your loved ones:
🏥 Health & Mental Support

SAMHSA – Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration

What they do: Free and confidential help with substance use and mental health disorders.

Hotline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) – 24/7, anonymous support

Website: samhsa.gov

🧒 Support for Children & Families

WIC – Women, Infants, and Children Program

What they do: Nutritional and healthcare support for pregnant women, new mothers, and young children.

Federal Info Line: 1-800-522-5006

Find local WIC office: fns.usda.gov/wic

My Father-in-Law Thought We’d Keep Supporting Him Forever: How My Husband’s Widowed Dad Ended Up Living With Us for 11 Years and Still Refuses to Move On