Last year, my mum did something I never expectedshe decided she would sell us vegetables from her own garden. She said we never came round or helped her out, so thats how it was going to be. She seemed to forget rather quickly who had paid for the water, the greenhouse, and the labourers who dug over the soil and helped her lay out the beds. We could buy fruit and veg cheaply at the shops anyway.
We never had a home in the countryside. We always lived in town, and, honestly, I dont think Dad ever even saw a potato in the ground before it ended up on a shelf at Sainsburys. My mum, on the other hand, grew up in a village and had had quite enough of gardening in her childhood and youth, so she never pined for it again.
When Dad was alive, there was no need to grow your own to get by. He provided for the family, even when it seemed impossible. Mum worked too, but Dad mostly covered the bills.
Even afterwards, not much changed. Once I was old enough and working, I did my bit to help. We lived together, so we shared the bills. I only moved out after I got married, which was two years ago.
Last year, Mum retired and decided she wanted to buy a plot with a little cottageshe longed for the old days, reminiscing about her childhood spent in her grandmothers enormous garden. Mum withdrew her savings from the bank and bought the place. I wouldnt say its the cosiest, but Mums happy, and thats what matters.
Of course, my husband and I had to pitch in to make the house and garden liveable. We could afford to; we earned decent wages. Not enough to build a mansion, of course, but enough to fix up the house, get the plumbing sorted, bring water onto the plot and into the house, and glaze the veranda.
We outright refused to act as her weekend work crew. We never had the time or the energy for that. Were city folk, and neither of us has any interest in digging over soil. At the weekend, wed rather have a lie-in, head out with friends, or just spend time together.
Wed get plenty of ticking-off from Mum for this lack of interest, but it would blow over when the next request for funds came along. And there were plenty: the greenhouse, then Mum wanted raised beds, then there was digging to do and shrubs to pull up. We paid for all these jobsMum didnt actually have to do much herself in the end.
We even sorted out taxis for her when she had too many shopping bags and didnt want to lug them on the train and then walk home.
Now and then, Mum would tell me about her gardening antics and send photos showing how beautiful and colourful everything lookeda proper miracle, shed say. I couldnt really muster much enthusiasm; it just didnt mean anything to me. This went on until Mum sent a picture of her strawberries.
They were huge and bright redI suddenly remembered what they tasted like and my mouth watered. I asked her to put some in a tub for me and said Id come by after work to pick them up. It never occurred to me that Mum would send over pictures of containers in different sizes and tell me the prices.
I had to reread her messageI thought Id missed the point and she was talking about something else. I gave her a ring and asked if Id got it rightwas she really planning to *sell* me her strawberries? Yes, she was.
Well, what did you expect? she said. Im here day in, day out, slaving away over every last strawberry to get them so perfect, while you two, lazing about, havent come even once to help! Why should I just give you things for nothing? If you dont work, you dont eatthats how it is, Mum declared.
I reminded her that wed done more than our share to help create that garden in the first place. Mum was indignant that I was now asking her for money for my help: How can you speak to your mother like that?
Out of principle, Im not buying food from my mum. Let her sell it to someone else. My husband and I will just pick up what we need from the marketits simple these days. Mum kept trying to flog us cucumbers and courgettes, only to get a flat no.
Were not going to help with the garden again, even if she asks. We will help Mum with bills, medicine, or necessities, of course, if she needs itbut definitely not for the garden.
