I’ll Get Married, But Definitely Not to This Handsome Guy – Yes, He’s Wonderful in Every Way, But He’s Just Not for Me “Again Mum’s come home with her boyfriend—and some other bloke. Already drunk,” Irina squeezed herself into the corner behind the cabinet. “Nowhere to hide, and it’s snowing outside. I’m so sick of this. In summer I’ll finish my GCSEs and move to town. I’ll get into a teacher’s college and become a teacher. It’s only six miles to the city, but I’ll live in student housing.” Mum and the guests settled in the kitchen. There was the glug of liquid being poured into a glass, the smell of sausage. Irina swallowed. “Wait a minute, you!” Mum’s voice rang out. “Why are you playing hard to get?” “There’s two of you…” “Not their first time in a group,” came Mikhail, Mum’s boyfriend. There was a crash of falling dishes. Scraping, panting. Irina pressed herself further into the corner. The noise suddenly died down. “Listen, Nikita, she’s asleep,” Mum’s boyfriend called out. “You said she’s a good girl, but I’ve got a thing for her…” “Listen, she’s got a daughter…” “What daughter?” “Ira, she’s grown up. Probably hiding in her room.” “Go get her,” Nikita said gleefully. “Ira, where are you?” Mum’s boyfriend entered the room, spotted Irina, and grinned. “Come on, sit with us!” “I’m fine here.” “Don’t be shy.” Mikhail tried to hug her. Irina grabbed a vase from the cabinet and brought it down on Mum’s boyfriend’s head. There was the crash of glass. Irina broke free and ran out of the room. “Get her!” Mikhail shouted. But Irina was already at the front door. No time to grab shoes, so she sprinted into the snow in just socks, old shorts, and a t-shirt. The men chased after her. The village street was empty. Where do you run at night in the snow? She heard shouts behind her. At the huge house she passed, a dog barked—a man’s voice shouted at the dog. Irina rushed to the gate and knocked. A man in his forties opened the door. “Please help me,” she said softly, making eyes at him. “Come in!” He tugged her inside and shut the door. “Oleg, who is it?” A woman stepped onto the porch. “Here,” Oleg nodded towards Irina. “She’s being chased by some blokes.” “Quick, get inside!” The woman grabbed Irina’s hand. “You can tell us everything.” “Ira, come out and don’t cause trouble!” Mikhail’s voice rang out. “Oleg, don’t get involved!” the woman shouted. “Get in here!” The shouts from the street, barking from the yard. “We need to call the police,” the woman pulled out her phone. “Polina, don’t. I’ll handle it myself. They’re locals.” “How do you plan on handling them?” “Nicely. Calm the girl down!” Oleg grabbed a carrier bag, went to the fridge, and dropped in a bottle and a chunk of sausage. Out in the yard, he patted the dog and they stepped into the street. Mikhail ran toward him. “Hand over Ira!” “Here, have these and go home.” The men opened the bag, smiled at the bottle and sausage, nodded, and left. *** “Alright. I’m Polina Sergeievna,” the woman said, putting the kettle on. “Come sit, tell us who you are and what happened.” “I’m Irina,” she started, teeth chattering. “I live on this street, at the end.” “You’re Kira’s daughter?” “Yes.” “We haven’t lived here long, but we’ve heard about your mum.” Irina lowered her head and sobbed. “There, there—don’t cry!” the woman said, pressing Irina to her chest. Irina clung to her, sobbing harder. “Alright, alright! Let’s have some tea.” The man returned. “All sorted.” “What do we do about this pretty girl?” Polina smiled at Irina. “Let’s talk tomorrow! Tea first, and she needs a bath.” “Hungry?” Polina set a mug before Irina, smiling. “I can see you are.” Sandwiches and leftover cake appeared on the table. “Eat, eat!” Oleg smiled too as Irina looked longingly at the food. They didn’t question Irina further, trying not to make her uncomfortable. After dinner, Polina led Irina to the bathroom. “Wash up, put this dressing gown on!” *** All Irina wanted was not to be thrown out into the street tonight. How lovely the warm bath felt, compared to the freezing outside. But she knew she had to get out—the hosts were waiting. She emerged. The couple sat together on the sofa. She smiled apologetically. “Thank you!” “Listen, Irina,” Polina began. “From what I see, no one’s coming to look for you. You don’t want to go home.” Irina lowered her eyes. “Tomorrow morning, we have to drive out early…” “I understand,” Irina bowed lower. “You’ll be alone. Don’t open to anyone! Our Jack won’t let anyone in the yard. Got it?” “Yes!” Irina said, unable to hide her emotion. “You can make borscht while we’re gone,” Oleg smiled slyly. “Can you?” “I can,” Irina said quickly, still afraid she’d be tossed out. “I’m good at cooking. And I can clean too.” “Clean downstairs if you like,” Polina agreed. *** She woke with the hosts in the morning, lying still in bed, always worrying she’d be kicked out. The car made noise in the yard, then it went quiet. She got up, washed, found hot tea, bread, sausage, cheese, and pork ribs waiting. She ate, cleaned the table, wiped everything down, scrubbed the floors. In the hallway she spotted a vacuum, turned it on, and started cleaning. Just as she turned it off… “And what’s all this about?” came a voice behind her. She spun around. A tall, handsome boy of about eighteen, curiosity gleaming in his brown eyes. “I’m cleaning,” Irina mumbled. “Who are you?” “Well…” The boy shook his head, pulled out his phone. “Mum, I’m home. Who’s this?” “Son, let this girl stay for a while.” “Fine by me.” He put the phone away, eyed Irina up and down, and headed to the kitchen. “Would you like tea?” she asked. “I’ll sort myself out.” *** Irina put away the vacuum, started dusting, listening for every noise from the kitchen. The boy ate, went to the bathroom. Emerged freshly shaved, smelling of aftershave. “Oi, mate, give us another bottle!” yelled someone outside. “What’s this?” The boy went to the window. “Don’t open for them!” Irina cried in panic. He looked at her with interest, then smiled for some reason, heading for the door. Irina darted to the window—by the fence stood Mum’s boyfriend with his mate, shouting. She was scared. The son stepped out. The men rushed him—and suddenly landed face-first in the snow, both at once. The boy bent over them, said something, and they slunk off toward Mum’s house. *** The boy returned, watched Irina freeze in fear. Approached: “What, you scared?” Unthinking, Irina buried her face in his chest and cried. “What’s your name?” he asked. “Irina.” “I’m Ruslan. Don’t worry. They won’t come back.” *** Ruslan headed upstairs to his room and stayed there till evening. Irina made borscht, sat at the kitchen table, deep in thought. She longed to stay in this house with these kind people, but knew she’d crossed every line of propriety. The hosts returned. Polina Sergeievna looked around at the spotless kitchen in amazement. Oleg Romanovich smiled approvingly at the borscht. “I’d best go home,” Irina said with resignation. “Thank you for everything!” “Irina, stay a few more days!” “Thank you, Polina Sergeievna! I’ll go home,” Irina repeated, heading for the door and pausing. Ever since yesterday, she’d worn a borrowed dressing gown and slippers. “Come on!” Polina guided her to the lounge. Opened the wardrobe, rummaged through clothes, brought out jeans, a jumper, a warm sports jacket. “Put these on! We’re nearly the same size.” “You really don’t…” “Can’t have you going home half-dressed! Just put them on. I won’t miss them.” She did. Sneaked a look in the mirror—she’d never had such nice clothes before. At the door, Polina made her put on a wool hat and boots. “Irina, wear them in good health!” “Thank you so much, Polina Sergeievna!” *** Life returned to its old routine. Not quite the old routine. Mum found work at a farm. Her boyfriend vanished, taking his mate with him. Spring arrived. One day, Irina was at home doing her homework when someone knocked at the gate. She peeked out the window and couldn’t believe her eyes—it was Ruslan. He nodded—come out. She didn’t just come out—she flew. “Hi!” Ruslan smiled. “Hello!” “Mum wanted to invite you over.” *** Soon she was back at the house where she’d spent such a happy day. “Hello, Irina!” Polina greeted her at the door with a hug. “Hello, Polina Sergeievna!” “Come in! Let’s have some tea.” As they sat, Polina got serious. “I’ve got a favour to ask. My husband and I are off to Turkey for a month,” she smiled. “My son’s barely at home. Would you look after the house? Feed Jack and the cat, water the flowers. I’ve got loads of plants.” “Of course, Polina Sergeievna!” “Excellent.” She brought some money. “Here’s two hundred quid.” “Polina Sergeievna, you shouldn’t…” “Take it! We won’t miss it. Now come, I’ll show you everything!” Irina carefully memorised the locations of plant pots, cat food, meat for the dog. Then Polina called out, “Ruslan!” He appeared from his room. “Introduce Irina to Jack!” “Come on,” Ruslan gently laid a hand on Irina’s shoulder. They went out, unleashed Jack, and went for a walk. Ruslan chatted about uni, karate, his dad’s business. Irina’s thoughts were elsewhere. She felt there was a gulf between her and Ruslan—a gulf like the one between her mum and Ruslan’s parents. Yes, they were kind, good people, but this wasn’t a Cinderella story—this was life. “In two months I’ll take my college entrance exams, and I’ll pass. I’ll study, work, hustle, but I’ll make something of myself. I’ll get married, but definitely not to this handsome guy. Yes, he’s wonderful in every way. But he’s just not for me! I’m grateful to Polina Sergeievna for the clothes and the £200. At least I’ll manage when I first move to the city.” With a sort of sixth sense, the girl knew that at this very moment, her difficult childhood had come to an end. And adult life was beginning—not any easier, but where everything depended on her alone. They reached the house. Irina stroked Jack’s neck, smiled at Ruslan, and headed home. Tomorrow her job at the house would begin. Just the job—nothing more!

I will never marry, least of all to that handsome fellow. Yes, he is a fine young man in every respect, but he is not for me.

Mother arrived again with her boyfriend and yet another man, both already half-drunk. I remember, I shuffled off to the corner behind the cabinet, clutching my knees.

No escape now, snows already fallen outside, I thought as their laughter spilled through the rooms. How tired I am of this life. Once summer comes, and I finish my exams, Ill go to the city. Ill enter teacher training college and become a schoolmistress. Its only six miles to town, but Ill stay in the boarding house.

The adults settled themselves in the kitchen. The sound of pouring liquid filled the room, mixed with the strong smell of sausage. My mouth watered in spite of myself.

Now, wait a minute! Mothers voice rang out.

Why so shy? said one. Theres two of us here

First time for everything her boyfriend chortled.

The clatter of a fallen dish broke the mood. Scuffling, gruff breathing followed. I pressed myself tighter into the shadows. Soon the noise seemed to die.

Listen, Michael, shes asleep, I heard the boyfriend say.

You called her a good sort, but Im not so sure

Shes got a daughter, you know

A daughter?

Yes, Ivy. Shes not a child anymore. Probably hiding in the front room.

Bring her here! said the others voice, full of cheer.

Where are you, Ivy? The boyfriend entered, saw me, and grinned that disagreeable way. Come on, sit with us!

Im fine just here.

Oh, dont be shy. He reached out, trying to pull me out.

But I grabbed the vase from the cabinet and smashed it over his head. Glass shattered on the floor. I ran, bursting from the room.

Get her! he yelled.

I reached the front door before they moved, had no time for bootsonly old socks, shabby shorts, and a worn shirtand dashed into the frozen night.

Chasing behind came both men. The street in our small village lay deserted; where should I run in the snow at this hour? Their voices echoed through the chill. As I passed the grand manor, barking erupted, and a mans voice called out to the dog.

I darted to the iron gates and knocked with all my strength. A man in his forties opened the door.

Please help me, I whispered, clinging to the hope on his face.

Come inside, he said, pulling me through and locking the door.

Whos there, Tom? came a womans voice from the hallway.

He nodded at me. Some blokes are chasing her, Angie.

Quick, into the house! She pulled me by the arm. Youll tell us everything.

Ivy! Come outside, will you! echoed the boyfriend from the lane.

Tom, dont get involved! Angie called. Come inside, love!

Shouts came from the road, joined by the barking of their dog.

We must call the police, Angie said, brandishing her phone.

No, let me handle it, Tom replied. Theyre local, by the sound.

And what do you mean to do about it?

Well have a word. Calm her down, please!

Tom grabbed a carrier, went to the fridge, and dropped in a bottle and a piece of sausage. He stroked the dogs head in the yard, then strolled out to meet them.

The boyfriend lunged at him. Hand over Ivy!

Tom handed over the bag. Here, now leave her be.

The men peeked inside, their scowls softened at the sausage and drink. Lets go, Mike.

***

Yes, I am Angela, Mrs. Palmer, the woman said, setting the kettle on. Sit down, dear, and tell us your story.

I could barely get the words out, my teeth chattering: My name is IvyI live at the far end of this lane.

Youre Kiras daughter, arent you?

Yes.

Weve not been here long, but everyone knows about your mother. Her tone softened, and I looked down, crying.

Hush now, dont cry. She came over and hugged me gently, a gesture I had never known. I clung to her, sobbing even harder.

There, there! Enough tears. Time for tea.

Tom entered the kitchen. All sorted.

Angela gave him a meaningful look, nodding at me. And what shall we do about this lovely young lady? Suddenly, she smiled.

Well discuss it tomorrow. For now, let’s have tea, and then straight to a hot bath.

Are you hungry? Angela smiled, setting down a mug of tea. I can see that you are.

Sandwiches and the last of the cake appeared on the table.

Eat, eat! Tom urged, watching me sneak glances at the food.

They didnt pester me with questions, and even tried not to stare. Seeing me uncomfortable, they left me be.

After dinner, Angela led me to the bathroom. Clean yourself up! Put this dressing gown on.

***

All I wanted that night was not to be thrown back onto the streets. It was bliss lying in the warmth, thinking of the bitter cold outside. But soon I had to emerge; my hosts were waiting.

I entered the living room, where the couple sat entwined on the sofa. I tried a hesitant smile. Thank you.

Angela spoke gently, Now, Ivy, I gather no ones coming to look for you, and youve no wish to return home.

I bowed my head low.

Tomorrow, we must leave early

I understand, I said, my voice shrinking.

Youll be here alone. Dont open the door for anyone. Jackthe dogwont let anyone into the garden. Is that clear?

Yes! I cried, surprised at my own relief.

If you like, you could make us a bit of stew before we come back. Tom grinned slyly. Can you?

Yes! Im quite good in the kitchen. And I can tidy up, too.

Do some cleaning downstairs, if its not too much trouble, agreed Angela.

***

I woke up at the same time as my hosts and lay in bed, terrified they might send me away. Soon the car rumbled out of the yard, and all was still.

I rose, washed, and went to the kitchen. On the table sat warm tea, fresh bread, sausage, cheese; on the counter, pork ribs.

I ate, cleared the table, wiped the surfaces, and mopped the floors.

In the corridor, the vacuum caught my eyeI switched it on and started to clean.

Id just switched it off when a voice startled me from behind: And what’s all this, then?

I spun around to see a tall, handsome lad, about eighteen, eyes wide with curiosity.

Im just cleaning, I mumbled. And you are?

Well he shook his head, then pulled out his mobile.

Mum, Im home. Whos this?

Let the girl stay awhile, son, Angelas voice floated in.

Fine by me. He tucked his phone away, and, giving me an appraising look, wandered off to the kitchen.

Would you like some tea? I ventured.

Ill sort myself out.

***

I packed away the vacuum, started dusting shelves, listening for every sound from the kitchen.

The boy finished breakfast and entered the bathroom. He emerged shaved and smelling strongly of cologne.

Suddenly, from outside: Oy, mate, get us another bottle!

Whats this now? The lad peered out the window.

Dont open up! I said desperately.

He glanced at me, half-amused, then walked to the door.

I ran to the window. The boyfriend and his mate stood at the fence, shouting. Fear pierced me.

The son stepped out, and sure enough, the men hurried to him. Thenstrangelythey both simply collapsed onto the snowy path, as if felled at once.

He leaned over, said something, and the two rose and slunk off back toward my mothers house.

***

He returned, paused before me, and asked, Whats the matter, you scared?

I couldnt help myselfI pressed my face into his chest and cried.

Whats your name? he suddenly asked.

Ivy.

Im William. Enough crying now. They wont bother you again.

***

William disappeared upstairs to his room for the rest of the day. I made stew, then sat quietly at the kitchen table, deep in thought.

Of course I wanted to staythese people were so kind. But I knew I had crossed a line.

Later, Angela and Tom returned. Angela surveyed the sparkling kitchen with approval. Tom tried the stew, nodding.

I suppose Id best go back, I said, resigned. Thank you for everything.

Ivy, do stay a few more days!

Thank you, Mrs Palmer. But I must go home, I repeated, walking to the door, frozen in place. I was still wearing borrowed clothesa dressing gown and old slippers from anothers wardrobe.

Come along. Angela took me to the sitting room, opened the wardrobe, and rummaged through the clothes. She found a pair of jeans, a thick jumper, and a warm coat.

Try these! We’re near enough the same size.

Ohyou really dont need to

You cant go home half-dressed. On with it! I wont be worse off.

I put them on, sneaked a look in the mirror; Id never owned such nice clothes. In the hall, she gave me a woolly hat and winter boots.

Take care, Ivy!

Thank you, Mrs Palmer!

***

Life settled into old patterns, though not quite as before. Mother found work on a farm; her boyfriend and his friend disappeared, never to be seen again.

Spring came. One afternoon, sat with my schoolwork, someone knocked at our gate. Peering out, I was shocked to see William standing at the fence. He nodded, signalling for me to come out.

I didnt walk; I flew.

Hello! William grinned.

Afternoon!

Mum wanted to see you about something.

***

And so I returned to the house where I had felt so safe for at least one day.

Hello, Ivy! Angela greeted me at the door, arms open for a hug.

Good afternoon, Mrs Palmer!

Come in, dear! Lets have tea.

She poured me a mug and sat beside me.

I must ask you a favour. Tom and I are flying to Turkey for a month, she said with that far-off smile. My sons rarely at home. Could you look after the place? Feed Jack and the cat, water the flowersthere are ever so many.

Absolutely, Mrs Palmer!

Splendid! She counted out twenty pounds. Take this.

Mrs Palmer, you neednt!

Go on, were not wanting for money. Come along, Ill show you everything.

I paid careful attention as she pointed out each pot and tub, the cats food, the dogs meat, all the little details. Then Angela called out for William.

Show Ivy Jacks ways! William emerged from his room at once. Take her for a walk with him.

Come on! He lightly put his hand on my shoulder, and we stepped outside with Jack.

All along the lane he chatted about his studies, about karate, about the business he ran with his father.

But I was thinking about something else entirely. Between William and me, I saw, there lay a chasm as wide as the one between my mother and his parents. They were good people, kind people, but life is no fairy tale.

In two months, Ill take my exams, pass them. Ill study, work, do my best and become someone. Ill marry, one day, but not this charming boy. Yes, hes wonderful in every way; just not mine.

Im grateful to Angela Palmer for the clothes and that twenty pounds. At least, Ill survive at first in the city.

Some instinct told me that at that very moment, my hard childhood ended forever. Adult life beganperhaps just as hard, but now it would depend only on me.

Soon, we reached the cottage. I stroked Jacks neck, smiled at William, and set off home. Tomorrow, my work at the cottage would begin. Work, and nothing more.