Déjà Vu She Had Always Waited for Letters. Since Childhood. All Her Life. Addresses Changed. Trees Seemed Smaller, People More Distant, Hopes Fainter. He Trusted No One and Expected Nothing. Outwardly, Just an Ordinary, Strong Man—Work, a Dog at Home, Trips Alone or with His Four-Legged Friend. She Was an Endearing Girl with Big Sad Eyes. When Someone Asked Her, “What Can’t You Leave the House Without?” She’d Say, “My Smile!” and Her Dimples Spoke for Themselves. She’d Always Been Friends with Boys—A Pirate in a Skirt, They Called Her in Her London Neighbourhood. But Alone, She Played a Game: She Was a Mum with Many Kids, a Good Husband, Living in a Large, Cosy House with a Flowering Garden. He Couldn’t Imagine Life Without Sport: Medals, Trophies, and Certificates Dozing in a Garage Box—Kept for His Parents Who Were So Proud! For Him, It Was Never About the Wins, But the Challenge and the Surge of New Strength After Exhaustion. Her Parents Had Died When She Was Seven. She and Her Younger Brother Were Sent to Different Foster Homes. They Grew Up Apart, With Their Own Battles and Joys. Those Homes Were Behind Them Now—They Lived Across the Road from Each Other, In a Neighbourhood of Cosy Streets, Cheery Gardens, and Farmer’s Markets. Her Brother’s Family Were Her Closest Friends. It Was an Anxious Day… Her Shift Ended and She Crossed the Ambulance Car Park. Old Arthur, the Senior Driver, Caught Up, Gave Her a Fatherly Hug, and Thanked Her for the Pies. “Get Some Rest, Will You?” “Plenty of Time!” She Grinned, Blew Him a Kiss, and Hurried to Her Car. In the Holidays, She and Her All-Male Crew Were Often on Shift—Few Doctors Wanted the Holiday Hours. Being Well-groomed Boosted Morale—A Cheerful Doctor Changes Everything. He, Meanwhile, Was Racing Toward His Parents’ House, Medals Rattling in the Boot, Dog Restless on the Backseat. His Dad Had Suggested They Welcome the New Year Together. He’d Loaded The Box of Trophies, Glad He Wasn’t On Duty for Once. His Heart Ached Over Rare Visits Home… Days Before Christmas, His Father’s Phone Call Woke Him: “Mum’s Ill.” His Father, A Retired Colonel, Couldn’t Hide His Worry. His Parents, Together Since School, Still Looked At Each Other Like Young Lovers. She Was Baking as Always—A Tradition, Delivering Pies Around the City After Her Shift. She’d Slept a Few Hours at Work—Otherwise, Old Arthur Wouldn’t Let Her Drive, He’d Insist on Being Her Chauffeur. About Ten Miles from His Childhood Home, A Blizzard Began. He Remembered His Dog Not Wanting to Get In, Those Countless Trips, The Road, Always The Road… “Mum, Dad—Hold On… You’re All I’ve Got.” The Dog Licked His Head in Sympathy. “Sorry, Old Boy. Of Course, You Too…” She Slowed The Engine—the Blizzard Hit at the Worst Time. One Pie Left, Just a Few Miles Along the Village Road to Her Favourite Patient—A Spirited Elderly Lady (though She’d Never Call Her “Granny”) with Her Loving Husband, Both Keen Travelers. Who Her Own Parents Might Have Become… A Shadow Leapt—Right Into Her Headlights. Against The White Curtain of Snow. “Where Did You Come From, Girl, From the Woods? Or Did Someone Lose You?… Those Eyes! Why Is Your Neck So Sticky?… Wet Jumper, Everything Spinning… Jack—Jack, Old Friend… Why Does It Hurt So Much? Mum, I’m Coming, Dad, I’m So Close… Dark.” Arthur Was Out of Reach. He Went to Get His Grandkids. No, The Ambulance Wouldn’t Make It Through This Snow. “Hang In There, Mate—Let Me Get You Free. My God! There’s a Dog, Too…” She’d Only Just Set Off Again When a Silver Car Whipped Past. “Someone’s Racing Home,” She Thought. But Barely Minutes On, She Found The Silver Car Flipped Into a Ditch. A Black Dog Lay Nearby—Alive, At Least. “Is It Even Late?” She Wondered, Letting a Hot Shower Chase Away Her Shivers. “How’d You Get Him Out? He’s a Solid Bloke!” Her Brother’s Voice Echoed in Her Mind, the Ache of Her Muscles Proof Enough. She Took the Man and Both Dogs to Hospital in Her Own Car. On the Way, Her Brother Met Her to Help. She Returned Later to The Village—to Deliver The Pie After All, and Picked Up The Box That Had Fallen from The Car’s Boot. “Perhaps It Means Something to That Man. At Least Everyone Survived… When He Comes Round, I’ll Return It.” The Elderly Lady’s Husband, Looking Lost, Answered Her Knock. “Is Something Wrong?” She Asked. “My Wife’s In Hospital. I Haven’t Heard from Our Son, Can’t Reach Him…” She Lowered Her Eyes. “Are You All Right?” He Took Her Hand. “Shall I Drop You at The Hospital?” She Offered. They Drove Silently; The Snow Had Ceased. “You’ve Got a Box on Your Backseat—May I Ask Where It’s From?” The Colonel Finally Asked. “There Was a Crash. The Man Tried to Dodge a Dog Dashing From the Woods—The Silver Car Overturned, and the Box Fell Out…” “A Silver Car? With a White Dog Inside? The Dog From the Woods Was Black?” He Whispered. She Stopped the Car, Turned to Him. He Clenched His Fists, Stared Ahead. “He’s Alive! And Your Wife Will Recover.” She Hugged Him. “May I Call You Daughter?” “Of Course,” She Said, Tears Caught in Her Eyes. “My Wife Kept Dreaming About a Black Dog, Over and Over… But Our Son’s Dog Is White… Where Did the Black One Come From?” “Those Eyes—Unbelievable, So Sad…” Was the First Thing He Thought When He Woke, His Father Dozing by The Bedside. “Mum. The Crash.” He Remembered Everything—and The Girl’s Eyes. They Celebrated New Year at the End of January. His Mum Was Mending, His Dad Was Joyful, Jack (His Dog) Was Still Limping a Little, But Would Be Fine. The Boys Needed Training for Upcoming Competitions, But He Lingered at His Parents’ House—Thinking Always of The Girl… Already at the Gate, His Father Called Him From The Attic Window. “Need a Hand, Dad?” He Smiled at the Shelves—His Sports Trophies Had Somehow Made Their Way There. “How Did These Get Here, Colonel?” He Grinned. “Have a Guess!… I’ll Walk Jack Before You Go.” She Was Heading Home Early—Dina Was Waiting for Her. She Couldn’t Abandon the Black-and-White Dog at the Vet’s; The Mark on Her Chest Was a Heart. She Entered Her Building, Automatically Checked Her Letterbox. Almost Closed It, but Spotted a White Envelope. Inside, it Read: I’ll Come By This Evening. Thank You, Dear! Love Is a Compass—It Helps Us Find Our Way

Déjà Vu

She always waited for letters. Always. Since childhood. All her life.

Homes changed. The trees seemed to shrink, people grew more distant, expectations quieter.

He never trusted anyone and never waited for anything. Outwardly, an ordinary, sturdy fellow. Work. And a dog at home. Holidays alone or with his four-legged companion.

She was a charming girl with large, sad eyes. Someone once asked her,
Whats the one thing you dont leave home without?
My smile! she would reply, dimples spreading across her cheeks to prove it.

For as long as she could remember, shed been friends mostly with boys. The kids in their neighbourhood called her the pirate in a skirt. But she had a secret game she played whenever alone: she would pretend to be a mum with a house full of children, a kind husband, all of them living in a big, cosy house enveloped by a beautiful garden.

He couldnt imagine a life without sport. In his garage, trophies, medals and certificates slept quietly in a box. He wasnt sure why he kept them. Out of respect for his parents, so proud of him. He kept planning to bring them over. First places werent about triumph for him. He simply loved the processthe push to the breaking point, sweat and exhaustion, followed by the surge of new energy. A second wind. Another breath.

Her parents died when she was seven. She and her little brother were sent to separate childrens homes. Thats where they grew up, each fighting their own battles, mourning losses, finding little joys. Those days in care were behind them now. They now lived on opposite sides of the same street, a neighbourhood of low-rise houses, cosy lanes, bright gardens, and bustling farmers markets. Her brothers family were her only, best friends.

It was a restless day Her shift had just ended. She was crossing the motor yard when Mr. Howard, looking out for her like a father, hugged her and thanked her for the apple tart.
Go home and get some sleep, do you hear?
Ill manage! she laughed, pecked his cheek, and hurried to her car.
Ahh sighed the ambulance driver watching her leave.

Over holidays they were often on shift together. Few wanted to work at times like those, not even doctors.

Their crew consisted of her and two men. Her male colleagues didnt warm to her. She liked looking neat and attractiveit changed things, she thought, if the doctor was cheerful and smartly turned out.

He was driving fast as he could. Trophies jumped about in a box in the boot, his dog whimpering in the back seat. His father had suggested spending New Year’s Eve together. He had moved the box to his car that same day. He was excited that, for once, he wouldnt be working over the holiday. He missed being around his boys, and he did love coaching. Yet these rare visits to his parents home left an ache in his heart. Days before New Years, he was woken at dawn by the phone.
Mums not well. Even his ex-army colonel fathers voice shook. His parents had been together since school days, and even in later life, looked at each other as if just married. That spark between them always astonished him, as if they shared some secret.

She wore a tired smile. Every year before New Year’s, she baked piles of pies and delivered them throughout town after her shift. She had even managed a couple of hours rest in the break room. Otherwise, Mr. Howard would never have let her drive, would have driven her himself, beaming with childlike delight at her bashful smile.

She was ten miles out from her parents house when the snowstorm began. She remembered her dog, Jack, digging his paws in, not wanting to get in the carnoise from the boot, the never-ending journeys, the road, always the road…

Mum, Dad, hold on I have no one but you…

The dog immediately licked the back of his head, as if reading his thoughts.
Sorry, mate. Of course, you too

She slowed the engine. The blizzard struck so suddenly. She had just one pie left. Two, three more miles, then the road through the woods, and beyond the bend, that cluster of weekend cottages where her favourite patienta sprightly older womanlived. No, you couldnt call this woman a granny, not with the spark in her eyes. Her husband had the same glow. A loving couple, always off on adventures. Never complained. Just like her parents might have been

A dark sudden flashsomething streaked in front of her car, right against the snowy whitewash tumbling from the sky.
Where did you come from, girl? Out of the woods, or did someone lose you?… Beautiful eyes! Whys your neck sticky?… My jumpers wet Oh, how I want to sleep Jack, mate Why does it hurt so much?… Mum, Im nearly there, Dad So close Its dark

Mr. Howard didnt answer the phoneoff to pick up the grandkids. No way could an ambulance get through in such weather. Too snowed in.
Hold tight, my friend, Ill get you out. Good Lord Theres a dog too…

She was about to drive on when a grey car sped past.
Someones in a hurry to get home, she thought. Minutes later, a grey car lay overturned, spinning down an embankment. A black dog lay a few feet away. Alive, she thought.

Whats the time? she wondered. She disliked hot water, but only a scalding shower could stop her shivering. She sat down on the bathroom floor, closed her eyes, exhaled. Just a nap

How did you manage to haul him out? Built like a bulldozer! her brothers voice echoed in her head. Her body ached, muscles flaring with pain.

She took the man and his two dogs to hospital in her own car. Her brother met her halfway and helped out. Later that evening, she dropped by the cottages to deliver her last pieshe felt it mattered. Shed picked up a box fallen from the grey cars boot, not knowing why.
Perhaps its important to the bloke. Everyones alive, thats what counts. Hell be grateful once hes better.

The older womans husband answered the door, looking bewildered.
Is everything alright? slipped from her lips.
My wifes in hospital. I was about to go. Havent heard from our son. Cant get him on the phone…

She lowered her head in silence.
Are you all right? he asked, taking her hand.
Let me drive you? she suggested.

They drove in silence. The storm had passed.
Noticed youve got a box there on the back seatwheres it from? the colonel finally asked.
There was an accident. A man tried to swerve round a dog from the woods, his car flipped, the box fell out the boot…
A grey car? With a white dog inside and a black one from the woods? he said quietly.
She stopped the car, turned to him. The colonel clenched his fists, staring at the road.
Hes alive. And your wife will recover, she said, hugging him.
May I call you daughter? he asked softly.
Of course, tears in her eyes.

My wifes had peculiar dreams for days nowabout a black dog. But my son has a white dog. Where did the black one come from?

Beautiful eyes. Unbelievable. Sad… That was the first thing he remembered seeing after waking in hospital. His father dozed in the chair nearby.
Mum. The accident. It all came back. And the girls eyes…

They celebrated New Years at the end of January. His mother was on the mend. His father beamed. Jack still limped a little, but that would soon pass. Work awaited. Time to get the boys back in training after their festive break, prep them for competition. Hed stayed too long at his parents. Time to return to the citybut all he could think of was that girl.

He was already at the gate when his father called from the loft window.
Dad, need a hand?
His father smiled slyly. Glancing about, the man spotted his sports trophies lined up on the shelves.
Well now… And where did those come from, Colonel? he grinned.
Have a think Ill take Jack for a stroll while you pack.

She was heading home earlier than usual; Deena was waiting. She simply couldnt leave her at the vets now shed recovered. Otherwise, she would have ended up at a shelter. Deena wasnt all black; a white patch shaped like a heart marked her chest.

She let herself into the building, and almost automatically, barely thinking, unlocked her letterbox. She was about to close it, when a glance caught a white envelope.

The letter read:
Ill come this evening. Thank you, my dear!

Love, like a compass, will help you find your way.