“We’ll Be Staying With You For A While, Since We Can’t Afford To Rent A Place!” – My Friend Announced I’m a very active woman. Even at 65, I love travelling and meeting fascinating people. With both joy and nostalgia, I remember my youth—when holidays meant freedom! You could head off to the seaside, go camping with friends, or sail down any river, all without spending much. Sadly, those days are gone. I’ve always enjoyed meeting new people—whether on the beach or at the theatre—and some friendships lasted years. One summer, I met a woman named Sarah at a guesthouse. We parted as friends, occasionally exchanging letters over the years. Then one day, I received a mysterious telegram: “The train arrives at three in the morning. Meet me!” Uncertain who sent it, my husband and I stayed home, but at four in the morning, someone knocked on our door. There stood Sarah, two teenage girls, an elderly lady, and a man, with a mountain of luggage. My husband and I were stunned, but we let them in. Sarah exclaimed, “Why didn’t you meet us? I sent a telegram – that costs money, you know!” I apologised, saying we hadn’t realised who sent it. Sarah explained that one of the girls had finished school and planned to start university; the family had come to support her. “We’ll be staying with you! We can’t afford anywhere else!” I was shocked. We weren’t family—why should we let them live with us? We had to feed them three times a day; they brought some food but did not cook, just ate ours, and I ended up serving everyone. After three days, I couldn’t take it anymore and asked Sarah and her relatives to leave. A row erupted: Sarah smashed dishes and started screaming. As they packed up, they even managed to steal my dressing gown, a few towels, and, incredibly, my largest saucepan. I still don’t know how it disappeared! That was the end of our friendship, thank God! I never saw or heard from her again. How could anyone be so shameless? Now I’m much more cautious about befriending new people.

Well be staying with you for a while, since we havent got enough money for a flat! Those were my friends words when she rang me.

Now, Ive always been a sprightly sort of chap. At sixty-five, I still manage to explore plenty of places and meet all manner of interesting folks. Theres a certain mix of joy and melancholy when I look back at my younger days. You could holiday wherever you fancied! Trips to Brighton, camping out in the countryside with mates, or even taking a little cruise along the Thames. And all of it for rather little money.

But times have changed. My fondness for meeting new peoples never faded, mind. Id get chatting on a Cornish beach, or bump into someone interesting at the theatre. Quite a few of those acquaintances turned into longstanding friendships.

One summer, I met a woman named Grace. We spent the holidays at the same guesthouse in Devon, and parted as good friends. Over the following years, we wrote to each other now and then.

Then one day, I received a strange messagean unsigned telegram. It only said, The train arrives at three in the morning. Meet me! I hadnt the foggiest who couldve sent it. Needless to say, my wife and I didnt dash off anywhere. But at four in the morning, there was a knock at our front door. Opening it, I was gobsmacked. There stood Grace, along with two teenage girls, an elderly lady, and a man. Their luggage was piled high, and my wife and I just stared.

After the initial shock, we let these unexpected guests inside. Grace looked at me and asked, Why didnt you meet us? I sent you a telegram! And by the way, that wasnt cheap.

Sorry, I replied, we didnt know who sent it!

Well, youd given me your addresshere we are.
I thought wed just exchange letters, that was all!

Grace went on to explain that one of the girls had just finished school this year and was heading off to university. The rest of the family had come to support her.

Well be staying with you! We havent got any money for a flat or a hotel.

I was at a loss. We werent even related. Why should we let them all move in with us? We had to feed the lot of them three times a day. Theyd brought some food but didnt bother to cookjust ate what we prepared. I ended up doing everything for them.

After three days, I couldnt stand it anymore. I asked Grace and her relatives to leave, not caring much where they ended up. What followed was a blazing row. She started smashing dishes and shrieking madly.

Her behaviour left me stunned. They soon packed up, and managed to pilfer my dressing gown, a handful of towels, and somehow even made off with our largest saucepan. No clue how they smuggled that out, but it simply vanished!

So ended our friendshipwith relief, I must admit! Never heard from Grace or her lot again. How anyone could be so brazen escapes me.

Lesson learned: these days, Im a great deal more careful about letting new people into my life.