21st March
Today I find myself reflecting deeply on just how much my mother-in-law has influenced the course of my life. Shes now decided that shed like to move into my flat, generously giving her own home to her daughter.
My husband, Matthew, grew up among a large brood. His mother kept having children until finally, she had a daughter. A rather peculiar approach, but that’s her business, I suppose.
When I married Matthew, I genuinely believed myself to be lucky. He seemed responsiblebrave, strong, and someone who understood the importance of family. However, it became apparent from the start that he could never fully detach himself from his mother and younger sister. My mother-in-law never paid much attention to her sons, but her daughter, Alice, has always been at the centre of her universe.
Alice was only ten when I first entered their lives. In the beginning, I didnt mind her at all. But after five years, my patience wore thin. She was never interested in her studies, got involved with all sorts of dodgy lads, and, inevitably, every problem had to be sorted by Matthew. There were nights when Alice would phone for help, even in the dead of night, expecting him to drop everything.
I naïvely hoped that Alice would mature, get married, and all our lives would finally settle down. No such luck. When she did decide to tie the knot, my mother-in-law demanded Matthew and his brothers chip in for the wedding, as she hadnt a penny to scrape together. Alices husband was skint and earned very little, so the newlyweds ended up having to live with my mother-in-law.
After they had one child, then another, my mother-in-law realised the living conditions were unbearable. Thats when she hit upon what she clearly thinks is the perfect solutionmove in with Matthew and me, and hand her flat to Alice. I cant help but feel its a bit much, considering I bought our place with my own money, and Matthew hasnt contributed a single pound. What baffles me most is that Matthew is perfectly pleased with these arrangements as well; he keeps saying things like, Mum will be of help to you.
We only have a two-bedroom flat as it is, and I have absolutely no intention of compromising my comfort or sharing my space with anyone else. My mother-in-law thinks its only right we take her in, believing that as the eldest son, Matthews duty is to look after her.
I love my husband, and divorce is out of the questionhe truly means too much to me. But how can I make him see sense? How do I get across to him that living with his mother would be absolute hell for me? I just wish someone could give me some much-needed advice.
