“Out of My Home!” I Said to My Mother-in-Law as She Once Again Started to Insult Me.

Author Mitsuko NagasakiReading 3 minViews 1

Get out of my house! I snapped at my motherinlaw as she started her usual round of insults.

The only thing Id ever truly feared in my life was the fury of a motherinlaw. Id been lucky enough to escape it once. My first wife, Claire, had grown up in a childrens home and knew nothing of family. The marriage lasted a miserable five years before I finally filed for divorce. Wed wed while I was still a student at Manchester University. About a year in, Claire began drinking heavily, racked up debts and dragged me into her mess. I was forced to abandon my studies, take a job, and start chipping away at the mounting pounds I owed.

That first marriage brought nothing but trouble. When the divorce was final I breathed a sigh of relief at last the constant strife would be over.

For two years I lived alone, recuperated, and slowly pieced myself back together. Then I met Emily. Shed never been married and had never had a serious relationship. Things moved quickly. She proposed, I accepted, and we went to see her mother.

From the moment we crossed the threshold, I could see the irritation on her face. She tossed a curt Hello my way and slipped into another room. I hadnt even realized what was happening perhaps Id misread my own outfit, but I was dressed conservatively. At the kitchen table she stared at me in silence, a look that made my skin crawl. When I flushed, she snapped.

So this is you, no qualifications? she said with a thin smile and a tone of contempt. I hesitated a heartbeat, then answered calmly, sipping my tea. Yes, I didnt finish my degree. Life got in the way, but I intend to complete it.

She growled. You intend to finish your studies? And what about being a wife? When will you raise children, cook for your husband, keep the house tidy? Youre a proper dainty little thing, arent you? She laughed, took another sip, set her cup down, and continued, Let me tell you something, my son doesnt need a virgin like you at all. In my eyes youre average both in looks and shape and youve got no sense whatsoever.

In that moment I felt utterly insulted. I bolted from the table and fled to the bathroom, tears spilling over. A complete stranger was hurling abuse at me for no reason, and my husband kept silent. We left the house as fast as we could.

I didnt want to set foot in her home again. Yet she kept showing up at our place, each visit a fresh attempt to wound me with another barb.

I even consulted a therapist to find out what to do. After a few sessions it became clear that my motherinlaw was a classic manipulator and Id been a victim simply because Id let her run me down. The next time she tried to insult me, I told her straight away to leave my house.

We no longer see each other, and I couldnt care less. My husband has nothing to say about the whole affair.

For about a year, my son had been living with Kate, yet we’d never met her parents—which seemed odd to me, so I decided to look into it I’ve always tried to raise my son to respect women above all—the women in his life: his grandmother, his mother, his wife, his daughter. In my opinion, there’s no finer quality in a man than respect for women. My husband and I made sure our son had an excellent upbringing and education, equipping him with everything he’d need for a smooth journey through life. We never wanted to help him out too much, but even so, we bought him a two-bedroom flat. Although he had a job and supported himself, he couldn’t quite afford a home of his own. We didn’t give him the flat right away—in fact, we didn’t even tell him we’d bought it. And why? Our son was living with his girlfriend, after all. For about a year, our son had been sharing his life with Kate, but we’d never met her parents, and I found that strange. Later, I discovered that Kate’s mother used to be a neighbour of one of my friends. She told me something that left me with a bad feeling. It turns out Kate’s mother threw her husband out when his income dropped—but the real drama was only just beginning… The mother then started seeing a married, but wealthy man. Kate’s grandmother, like her daughter, also had a relationship with a married man, and even forced both her daughter and granddaughter to go work on his country estate. Because of all this, my son had already had multiple run-ins with his future mother-in-law. But what unsettled me most about this story is that both the mother and grandmother were driving a wedge between Kate and her father. It’s clear the girl loves her dad, but because of these two women, her relationship with him is at risk. And to top it all off, Kate has decided to drop out of her studies. She believes a man should provide for the family. I see her point—I’ve raised my son to do just that—but heaven forbid they ever face hardship. Who’s to say what will happen if life throws them a curveball? How will she support her husband in tough times? By the way, I transferred the flat back into my name, since I know I’ve raised a gentle soul, as the saying goes. And yes, everything acquired before marriage isn’t split in a divorce—but I have a feeling Kate is clever enough to leave my ‘gentleman’ with nothing but his socks.

— Needless to Say, This Is All My Fault! — My Boyfriend’s Sister Sobs, “I Couldn’t Have Imagined Something Like This Would Happen!” Now I Don’t Know What to Do, or How I’ll Manage Without Completely Losing Face My Boyfriend’s Sister Got Married a Few Years Ago. After the Wedding, It Was Decided the Newlyweds Would Live with Her Husband’s Mother. His Parents Have a Spacious Three-Bedroom Flat and Only One Son. “You Can Have Two Rooms, I’ll Keep One!” Promised the Mother-in-Law. “We’re All Decent People—I’m Sure We’ll Get Along Just Fine.” “We Can Always Find Our Own Place Later!” Her Husband Said, “But I Don’t See Any Harm in Trying to Live with My Mum. If It Doesn’t Work, We Can Always Move Out…” That’s Exactly What Happened. As It Turned Out, Living Together Wasn’t So Easy. Both Daughter-in-Law and Mother-in-Law Tried, but Things Got Worse Each Day. Tensions Boiled Over Now and Then, and the Arguments Grew More Frequent. “You Said If It Didn’t Work, We’d Move Out!” His Wife Cried to Him. “Well, Haven’t We Managed So Far?” His Mum Responded Dismissively. “These Are Just Trivialities—Hardly Reason to Pack Your Bags.” Exactly a Year After the Wedding, She Became Pregnant and Delivered a Healthy Baby Boy. The Baby’s Birth Coincided with Her Mother-in-Law Taking Early Retirement and Struggling to Find a New Job—No One Wants to Hire an Older Woman. So Daughter-in-Law and Mother-in-Law Stared at Each Other All Day, with Nowhere Else to Go. The Home Atmosphere Soured Quickly. The Husband Just Shrugged and Listened to the Complaints—He Was the Only Breadwinner. “We Can’t Move Out Yet—My Mum Can’t Support Herself. I Can’t Leave Her, and I Can’t Afford Both Rent and Helping Mum. Once She Finds Something, We’ll Move!” But His Wife’s Patience Was Exhausted. She Packed for Herself and the Baby and Moved Back to Her Own Mum’s. Before Leaving, She Told Her Husband She’d Never Set Foot in His Mother’s House Again. If He Cared About His Family, He’d Figure Something Out. She Expected That, Because He Loved His Family, He’d Try Straight Away to Win Her Back. But She Was Very Much Mistaken. It’s Been Over Three Months Since She Moved Out, and He Hasn’t Even Tried to Bring Her Back. Instead, He’s Living Comfortably with His Mum, Video Calling Wife and Child After Work, and Visiting on the Weekends at His Mother-in-Law’s. He’s Enjoying the Care of Two Women at Once, and—other than the occasional weekend—doesn’t even have to look after his son. His Life’s a Win! And the Mother-in-Law, frankly, hasn’t lost a thing! Meanwhile, the Young Woman Feels Miserable. She Loves Her Husband, Even Knowing He’s Doing Wrong. “What Did You Expect When You Left?” The Husband Shrugs, “You Can Come Back Whenever You Want.” It’s Obvious the Wife Has No Intention—or Ability—to Move into a Flat Alone, Especially as a New Mum on Maternity Leave. Is This Really the End of Their Family? What Do You Think—Does She Have Even the Slightest Chance of Returning to Her Mother-in-Law’s Home Without Completely Losing Face?