Hell be living with us The doorbell rang with that sharp, insistent chime that means someones at the door. Emily slipped off her apron, wiped her hands and went to answer. On the doorstep stood her daughter with a young bloke. Mum let them in.
Hey, Mum, the girl planted a kiss on Emilys cheek, meet James, hes moving in with us.
Hi there, the lad said, trying to sound friendly.
This is my mum, Aunt Sue, Emily introduced.
Lydia Margaret, her mum corrected, but you can call me Mum.
Whats for dinner? Emily asked.
Pea mash and sausages, she replied.
I dont eat pea mash, James muttered, shrugging his shoulders as he drifted into the hallway.
Come on, Mum, James hates peas, Emily squealed, eyes wide.
James flopped onto the sofa, dropped his backpack on the floor.
This is actually my room, Lydia said, a hint of irritation in her tone.
James, follow me, Ill show you where well be staying, Emily called out.
Im fine right here, he grumbled, standing up.
Mum, can you think of something to feed James? Emily asked.
Ive only got half a packet of sausages left, Sue shrugged. Thatll do with a bit of mustard, ketchup and some bread.
Sounds decent enough, James replied, and Sue headed to the kitchen, mumbling about how she used to bring home litters of kittens and puppies and now this guy shows up for a bite.
She ladled herself a big portion of pea mash, tossed two grilled sausages onto a plate, nudged the salad dish over, and dug in.
Mom, why are you eating alone? Emily asked as she entered.
Just got back from work and Im starving, Sue answered between bites. If anyone wants food, they can serve themselves or cook. Oh, and one more thing why is James moving in?
How come? Hes my husband.
Sue nearly choked on her sausage.
Your husband? she sputtered.
Exactly. Youre an adult now, you decide if you want to get married or not. Im nineteen, by the way.
You didnt even invite us to a wedding.
There was no wedding, just a quick civil ceremony. Since were now husband and wife, well be sharing a flat.
Congrats then. Why no ceremony?
If youve got cash for a wedding, feel free to hand it over and well find somewhere to spend it.
Got it, Emily said, still chewing. But why here?
Because their onebedroom flat is already four peoples crowded mess.
So you didnt even think about renting a place?
Why would we rent when I have my own room? Emily asked, bewildered.
Right, then can you get us something to eat?
Emily, the pot of pea mash is on the stove, sausages in the pan. If thats not enough, theres another halfpacket in the fridge. Help yourselves.
Mum, youve got a soninlaw now, Emily said, emphasizing the last word.
And what? Im supposed to break into a little dance for that? Im exhausted after work, lets skip the rituals. Use your own hands and feet, love.
Thats why youre still single! Emily snapped, slamming her bedroom door.
Sue finished her dinner, washed up, wiped the table and retreated to her bedroom. She changed into gym clothes, grabbed her bag and headed to the local fitness centre. Shes a freespirit, hitting the gym and pool a few evenings a week.
Around ten she got back, hoping for a hot cup of tea, only to find the kitchen in total chaos as if someone had tried to cook there. The lid from the pot was missing, the mash had dried and cracked, a packet of sausages lay open on the counter, stale bread without its bag, a scorched pan with its nonstick coating scratched by a fork. The sink was full of dishes, a sticky sweet puddle spread across the floor, and the flat smelled faintly of cigarettes.
Well, thats a new one. Emily never lets anything like this happen, Sue muttered as she opened the bedroom door. The young couple were sipping wine and smoking.
Emily, clean up the kitchen, will you? Buy a new pan tomorrow, she told them, heading back without closing the door.
Emily bolted up and lunged after her.
Why should we clean up? And where am I supposed to get money for a new pan? I dont work, Im studying. Do you care about the dishes?
Emily, you know the house rules: eat, clean up; make a mess, clean up; break something, replace it. Everyone looks after their own mess. And yeah, that pan isnt cheap, now its ruined.
You dont want us living here, do you? Emily snapped.
Nope, Sue replied calmly.
She didnt feel like arguing with her daughter, especially since shed never had any trouble with Emily before.
But I have my share, too.
Nope, the flat is mine, all of it. I bought it, paid for it. Youre just on the lease. Dont expect me to foot your bills. If you want to stay, follow the rules, Sue said in a steady voice.
Ive lived by your rules all my life. Im married now, you dont get to tell me what to do, Emily shrieked. And youre old enough to give us the place.
Ill give you the hallway in the block and a bench. Congratulations on the marriage? Nobody even asked me. Youre staying here alone or with your husband elsewhere. Hes not moving in, Sue shot back.
Fine, enough with your flat. James, were leaving, Emily shouted, gathering her things.
Within five minutes, the newlywed soninlaw barged into the flat.
Alright, Mum, dont get hissy, everythingll be fine, he slurred, swaying from a bit too much drink, Emily and I arent going anywhere tonight. Behave and well even keep things quiet down there.
What am I to you, a mum? Lydia snapped, Your mum and dad are still at home, so stop acting up and dont forget to bring your new wife along.
Yeah, sure, the lad snarled, raising his fist toward his motherinlaw.
Emily clutched his knuckles with manicured fingers, squeezing hard.
Let go, you lunatic! he growled.
Mom, what are you doing? Emily screamed, trying to pull her mother away.
Lydia shoved her daughter aside, kicked James in the groin and then jabbed his elbow into his neck.
Im going to press charges, he threatened, Ill take you both to court.
Hold on, Ill call the police so we can sort this properly, Sue replied.
The young pair fled the tidy twobedroom flat.
Youre not my mum any more, Emily yelled as she left, Youll never see your grandchildren.
Oh, what a tragedy, Sue said with a wry smile. At least Ill have a quiet life.
She looked at her hands a couple of nails were broken.
Just losses from you lot, she muttered.
After theyd gone, she cleaned the kitchen, tossed the ruined mash and the cursed pan, and changed the locks. Three months later, Emily showed up after work, looking gaunt, cheeks hollow, looking miserable.
Mum, whats for dinner? she asked.
Im not sure yet, havent decided, Sue shrugged. What do you feel like?
Chicken and rice, Emily whispered, And a bit of coleslaw.
Alright, lets pick up a chicken, Sue said. Youll have to sort the coleslaw yourself.
Emily didnt ask anything else, and James never turned up in their lives again.
