Nineteen years later, my mother reappearednow she wants money and a roof over her head.
I was ten when I learned that those who give you life arent always the ones who stay. It wasnt a slow departure, not a tearful goodbye. No, it was sudden.
One day, I had a home, a family, parents. The next, they left me at an orphanage and walked away without looking back.
No explanation. No final embrace. Not even a whispered promise theyd return.
The first days, I wept. The first weeks, I hoped. The first months, I waited.
I told myself it was a mistake, that theyd come back for me. I clung to the belief they loved me, that they must have had a reason for leaving.
But they never came.
In time, I accepted no one ever would. No one wondered where I was, whether I had enough to eat, or if I shivered through the night.
The orphanage was no place for illusions. There, we didnt speak of love or familywe learned to survive. I watched children break under the weight of abandonment, their eyes losing all light.
But I refused to drown.
I worked. I studied. I built my future with my own hands. I swore Id never depend on anyone again.
And I succeeded.
After years of sacrifice, I finally had all I needed. A small flat in Manchester, steady work, a car. I was alone, but I needed no one.
I thought my past was buried. But the past has a way of rising when least expected.
A shadow from the past.
It began on an ordinary morning.
I fetched my coffee from the corner café, as I always did. The scent of fresh grounds filled the air, and the world felt peaceful.
Then I saw her.
A woman stood across the street, staring at me with an intensity that unsettled me.
I looked away and walked on.
But the next day, she was there again.
And the day after.
I spotted her outside my building, hesitating, as if she wanted to come in but lacked the courage.
Then, one evening, she finally approached.
“Thomas is that really you?” Her voice trembled, barely louder than a whisper.
I turned, and for a moment, the world froze.
I knew her instantly.
Despite the years, the deep lines on her face, the streaks of grey in her hairI knew who she was.
It was her.
My mother.
The woman who abandoned me now wanted to stay.
She spoke before I could react, her words rushed, frantic, as if afraid Id leave before she finished.
She told me how life had battered her, how my father had turned to drink, how theyd lost everything.
Then came the request Id expected.
“Ive nowhere to go Could I stay with you?”
She had nothing.
No money, no home, no family.
And she wanted me to welcome her into my life.
She said she could care for me, cook for me, be the mother shed never been.
As if a single word could erase it all.
I listened. I watched the tears fall down her cheeks.
But inside me, there was nothing.
No anger.
No pity.
Only emptiness.
The decision that changed everything.
“You abandoned me.” My voice was calm, but cold. “You walked away and never looked back. Why do you think you have the right to return now?”
Her face darkened, her shoulders slumped.
“Thomas I made a mistake I was afraid I was lost But youre my son.”
I gave a bitter smile.
“I was your son nineteen years ago. Today, Im a stranger to you.”
She reached for me, seeking contact, hope.
I stepped back.
“Please Ive no one left.”
I hesitated. A fraction of a second.
Maybe someone else would have let her in.
Maybe someone else would have believed her.
But not me.
Not with her.
Shed made her choice nineteen years before.
Now it was my turn.
“Dont ever look for me again.”
She didnt argue.
She only bowed her head.
Then she turned and walked away.
I watched her disappear down the street, waiting to feel something.
Anything.
But there was nothing.
No relief.
No regret.
Only silence.
Perhaps, if shed stayed back then, Id have been someone else.
Perhaps Id have known what it was to have a family.
But Ill never know.
The past cant be changed. But the future?
Thats mine.
And I choose to walk it alone.
