My husband has become so full of himself that he believes he can dictate terms to me.
Thierry, my spouse, lately sees himself as the center of the universe and thinks he can set the rulesrules that send shivers down my spine. He threatened divorce if I stopped seeing my daughter, Élodie, from my first marriage. Seriously? She is my child, my flesh, my life. Does he really think he can erase her from my heart with threats? I still cant fathom that the man Ive shared so many years with could sink so low.
It all began a few months ago. Thierry has always had a strong-willed personality, which I once took as strength rather than a flaw. Hes confident, determined, used to having things his way. When we married, I thought Id found a solid partner who would support me and accept my family. Élodie was only five then. He immediately took to her, calling her Papa Thierry. I was delighted to see them so close. But over time, something shifted.
He started to distance himself from her. At first it was minor things: he no longer asked about her school day, he stopped playing with her as he used to. I chalked it up to fatiguehis job is demanding, and he often came home late. Then he grew irritated whenever I mentioned Élodie. You spend too much time with her, he snapped one evening at dinner. I was left speechless. How could I not look after my daughter? She lives with my mother, Jacqueline, in a nearby town, and I see her only on weekends. Those visits are my lifeline, my way of remaining a mother despite the distance.
Then the ultimatums arrived. A month ago, Thierry sat across from me in the kitchen, arms crossed, and stated flatly, I dont want you to see Élodie on weekends anymore. It disrupts our family. I thought Id misheard. What family? We have no children together, and Élodie is part of my life. I tried to explain that I could not abandon my childshes already suffered from the divorce and needs me. He shrugged, Shes old enough to manage. If you keep this up, Ill get a lawyer.
I was stunned. Divorce? Just because I want to be a mother to my daughter? The absurdity of it left me at a loss for a response. In that moment I realized the person I had counted on for support no longer saw me as his wife but as someone who must obey his rules. He wasnt merely trying to limit my contact with Élodiehe wanted to control my entire life.
Other memories surfaced: his criticisms of my mother, Jacqueline, whom he accused of spoiling Élodie; his grimaces whenever I bought gifts or paid for her activities; and that time he declared the past should stay in the past, clearly referencing my first marriage and my child. I had ignored those signs, but now they made sense. He could not tolerate Élodie’s presencehe wanted her erased.
I dont know what to do. Part of me wants to leave right away. I cannot live with a man who imposes such conditions. Yet another part is frightened. We have been together for seven years, we own a house, we have plans. I have invested so much in this relationship. How do I explain to Élodie that her mother is once again alone? She already asks why Papa Thierry no longer comes. How can I tell her that he wants me to forget her?
My mother, Jacqueline, urges me to protect my daughter, even if it means losing my marriage. Youll never forgive yourself if you choose him over her, she told me over the phone. Shes right. Élodie isnt just my pastshe is my heart, my responsibility. I remember holding her at birth, her first smile, her first steps. I cannot betray her for a man who treats her as a problem.
Still, Thierry wont back down. The other day he raised the issue again, harsher than before: Its either me or your daughter. I wont live with a woman who keeps returning to her past. I said nothing, knowing any reply would only enrage him further. Deep down, I had already made my choice. I will never stop seeing Élodie. Never. Even if it costs me my marriage.
Now Im thinking about the next steps. Maybe consult a lawyer to understand the ramifications of divorce. Find a better job so I can be financially independent. Ive even started looking for an apartment near Élodies home. Its scary, but also hopeful. I want her to know Ill always be there, no matter what.
Thierry may think his threats will make me bend. Hes wrong. I wont submit to rules that force me to give up what matters most. I will choose Élodie. And if it means starting over from scratch, Ill do itfor her, for us.
