Youve got no heart. Cant you see how much Olivers struggling? Hes your brotheryou couldve helped him. You only ever think of yourself.
Not long ago, my mum rang me and told me to clear out my things from her flat.
We can hardly move with all your clutter, she said.
This came after I refused to give my brother, Oliver, money for the deposit on a house. Yes, givenot lendbecause I know full well hed never pay me back.
When I said no, Oliver stormed out of my place in a rage. He was certain Id just hand over my savings because hes got a wife and kids, while I dont.
I need to get this off my chest because my familys being unfair, especially right before Christmas.
When I moved to Manchester for uni, I started working part-time straight away.
At first, I lived in halls, then I rented a flat with a mate. I didnt want to rely on my parents, so I worked hardnot just to support myself but to help my mum too.
She never outright took money from me, but shed always ask me to bring things back: clothes, shoes, bits for the house. And Id always turn up with bags full of groceries.
Mum lives in a three-bed flat with Oliver. Our dad passed three years ago.
Oliver never cared much for studying. After school, he went to work in Scotland, but the only thing he managed to buy was a second-hand car. When he came back, he started driving a cab.
Later, he married and moved his wife, Charlotte, into Mums flat.
Money was always tight because Oliver lived hand-to-mouth. The second he and Charlotte got paid, theyd blow it all.
Both Mum and Charlottes parents bailed them out regularly. Oliver knew someone would always step in, so he never bothered to earn more or sort his finances.
Now, Oliver and Charlotte have two kids, with a third on the way.
They decided Mums flat was too small and started looking to buy their own place.
Meanwhile, I rent a flat with my boyfriend, James. Were planning to marry but are waiting for a better time. Weve got steady incomesJames is a software engineer, and I run a few online shops.
We dont waste money on nonsense; were saving for our own home so we can start our marriage properly.
Mum knew our plans, but she still nudged Oliver to ask me for help.
They want to buy a house but havent got the deposit sorted, she told me.
When Oliver came over and demanded money, I refused.
He was livid. He thought I owed him simply because hes got a family and I dont.
Later, Mum called and said:
Youve got no heart. Cant you see how much Olivers struggling? Hes your brotheryou couldve helped him. You only ever think of yourself.
Then she added:
Come and take your things. Were tripping over your junk. And dont bother coming for Christmas. Olivers furious, and Im not keen on seeing you either.
I didnt argue. Ill collect my stuff and squeeze it into my rented place. When James and I buy our home, Ill move it there.
I couldve lent Oliver the money, but I know hed never repay it. And he didnt even ask for a loanhe expected me to hand over my savings.
Just because hes got kids
Sometimes, saying no isnt selfishits the only way to stop others from treating you like a wallet.
