“Youve got no heart. Cant you see how much Daniels struggling? Hes your brotheryou couldve helped him. You only ever think about yourself.”
Thats what Mum said when she rang me the other day, demanding I come collect all my things from her flat. “We can barely move in here with all your clutter,” she snapped.
It all started when I refused to give my brother, Daniel, the money for a deposit on a house. And I mean *give*, not lend, because I know full well hed never pay me back.
After I said no, Daniel stormed out of my place in a rage. He was convinced Id hand over my savings just because hes got a wife and kids, and I dont.
I need to get this off my chestits eating me up, especially with Christmas around the corner.
When I moved to Manchester for uni, I started working part-time straight away. First, I lived in halls, then shared a flat with a mate. I didnt want to rely on Mum and Dad, so I worked hard to support myselfand even helped Mum out when I could.
She never asked for cash outright, but shed always nudge me to bring something useful: clothes, shoes, bits for the house. And whenever I visited, Id turn up with bags full of groceries.
Mum lives in a three-bed terrace with Daniel. Dad passed away three years ago.
My brother never had much time for studying. After school, he went off to work in Scotland, but the only thing he managed to buy was a beat-up old car. When he came back, he started driving a taxi.
Then he married Emily, and they both moved in with Mum. Money was always tightDaniel lived hand to mouth. The second he and Emily got paid, it was gone.
Both Mum and Emilys parents kept bailing them out. Daniel knew someone would always step in, so he never bothered earning more or sorting his finances.
Now, Daniel and Emily have two kids, with another on the way. Theyve decided Mums place is too small and want to buy their own.
Meanwhile, I rent a flat with my fiancé, James. Were saving to buy our own place after we marryno point rushing when were comfortable as we are. James is an IT consultant, and I run a few online shops. Were careful with money, putting every spare penny aside for our future.
Mum knew our plans, yet she still put Daniel up to asking me for help. “They want to buy a house but cant scrape together the deposit,” she told me.
When Daniel turned up and demanded the money, I said no. He lost itacted like I *owed* him just because hes got a family and I dont.
Later, Mum rang. “Youve got no heart,” she said. “Cant you see how much Daniels struggling? Hes your brotheryou couldve helped him. You only ever think about yourself.”
Then she dropped the bomb: “Come get your things. Were tripping over them. And dont bother coming for Christmas. Daniels furious, and Im not keen on seeing you either.”
I didnt argue. Ill fetch my stuff and squeeze it into my rented place. When James and I buy our home, Ill move it all there properly.
I *couldve* lent Daniel the money, but I know itd be gone for good. He didnt even ask for a loanjust expected me to hand it over.
All because hes got kids
How would you deal with this?
