“I dont even want to get married because of this. I dont trust women! And dont you dare wreck your family over something stupid, you hear me?”
I had just finished my scrambled eggs and was sipping the last of my coffee when my wife, flushing red, asked in an awkward, hesitant voice:
“Is there someone else?”
“What makes you think”
“Dont lie to me, Simon. Just tell me the truth.”
Now it was my turn to reddensomething that rarely happens, only when I cant bring myself to speak the truth but refuse to lie.
“You dont have to say anything. I already know.”
Feeling scalded, I rushed outside. All day at work, I was on edge, furious with myself. The situation had thrown me off balance, forcing me to make a decision I wasnt ready for. I couldnt lie to my wifeshe meant too much to me.
Yes, there was another woman. Young, beautiful, stunningyoud laughmy head had been turned, nothing but testosterone clouding my judgment, right?
Wrong. She wasnt younger or prettier than my wife. She was an old classmate. My first, unrequited love. An unresolved chapter, you might say. Wed run into each other after years apart.
“Simon, is that you? I hardly recognize you! Proper London gent now.”
I froze. Standing in front of me, smirking, was Christina.
For a moment, I just stood there like an idiot, feeling completely exposed. She looked me up and downmy tormentor from school (shed saddled me with every cruel nickname imaginable, and theyd all stuck. “Simon” was one of the nicer ones).
“Come on, lets grab a coffee, catch up. Mini-reunion! Theres another old friend here tooshes just finishing shopping.”
Before I could reply, she emerged from the shopSophie. Blonde, delicate, ethereal. Seeing me, she smiled.
“Simon Caldwell, is that really you?” Her voice was melodic, painfully familiar. “How many years has it been?”
All I could manage was a weak smile, my throat tight with shock.
Of course, I took them to a café. We had a lovely chat, and the next day, unable to control my emotions, I waited for Sophie after work.
She wasnt surprisedacted as if it was expected. We sat in a café again, just the two of us this time, and then I ended up at her place. And just like that, I was gone.
For six months, I lived in two worlds. One: my familyJack and little Emily, whom I adored, and my wife, whom I loved and still love.
Yes, still love. It hadnt disappeared, just dimmed, buried under routine.
The other world? Sophie. A surge of emotion, the thrill of possession, passion. If I could, Id have kept diving between the two. Which was why, when my wife uncovered the truth so abruptly, I was completely unprepared.
The only thought that stuck by the end of the day: I needed a break. A real one, not just for one of them. Time to think and make a final choice.
I was about to call my wife, Rebecca, but she beat me to it.
“Simon, the kids and I are staying with my parents for a while. I need time to think,” she said. “Just promise me one thingstay in touch with Jack and Emily. They love you, and I dont want them hurt before they have to be.”
Even more lost, I went home. When I imagined making a decision, I hadnt considered that my wife might make one of her ownand not in my favor. Well, she had every right.
For days, I thought about Sophie (so fresh, so dazzling) and Rebecca (my wife). I only remembered the good timesI didnt want to lose either.
I dont know why, but at some point, I felt the urge to call my old school friend Greg. Wed been close since school, even served in the army together. Long ago, wed both been in love with Sophie unrequited, of course. Maybe thats why I called.
We arranged to meet. I invited him overit was pouring outside, and neither of us fancied a pub. Greg wasnt married, still living with his parents, and I was temporarily free. If needed, he could crash at mine.
After work, I stopped at the shop, grabbed some frozen pies, sausages, and a bottle (what else do blokes need?), then headed home to wait.
“Your place is nice! Really cosy! Happy for you, mate. Whens it my turn for a family nest? Your wife got any single friends?” Greg grinned, shaking my hand while glancing around.
We headed to the kitchen. Id already prepped everythingplates, cutlery, just needed to heat the pies.
“Wheres your missus?” Greg frowned. “Wanted to pay my respects, but its just you? Why didnt you say? I even bought cake and chocolates”
“Dont worry, well eat it. Theyre at her parents not for long. Come on, first round!”
We drank. Then a few more. Only then did I tell Greg about Sophie, the whirlwind affair, and my current mess. He stayed quietuncharacteristically so.
“What, no opinion? You were in love with her too. Or still are?”
“No, no! Definitely not now,” Greg laughed, though it sounded forced. “Listen, you dont want this. Trust me.”
“And whys that?” I snapped. “She barely gave us the time of day back then. If this is some gossip, Im not interested!”
“I lived with her for six months, Simon.” Greg sighed. “She was divorced by then. Know who her ex was? Ben Parker, remember him?”
“Parker? Didnt know. She mentioned being divorced, not who. Yeah, she fancied him, I recall. I nearly had a go at him back then.”
“So, you want the full story?”
“Mate, you started itfinish it.” I sobered up fast, sensing I wouldnt like what came next.
“Unlike you, I didnt just stare at herI wrote notes, carried her bag when she let me, even cornered her in the hallway a couple times. Got nowhere. She wanted Parker, and I wasnt competition. But Parker had optionsnot like us. Sophie fought for him like we fought for her.”
“They marriedperfect couple, right? Local golden pair. Seemed happy, until Sophie started nagging about money. Didnt want to live with his mum, wanted their own place, furniture, the works. So he went off to Europe for workdriving second-hand cars. Money came in, but on his last trip, he crashed. Badly.”
“Every penny hed saved went into patching him up. Credit where its dueshe got him back on his feet. Then suddenly, she had a flat. Left him.”
“We ran into each other or did we? I was leaving work, and she just happened to be walking past with Christinaher mate. Remember her? No idea what they were doing there, its not exactly a shopping district”
“We had coffee, then well, you know. I was over the moon! Ready to propose! Then she says shes off for two weekswork trip to Birmingham. Like an idiot, I believed her.”
“She came back with a Mediterranean tan. When I asked, she said, ‘Place was dull, so I hit the tanning salon and spa in my free time.'”
“I got jealous, started following her, especially when she couldnt meet. And guess what? Caught her! A Range Rover pulls up, she gets outnot alone. Some sixty-year-old bloke. Lost it, ran over and laid into himnearly got arrested. Turns out he was some big shot. Only got off because he didnt want the scandalhis mistress, the flat hed bought her”
“Thats my story. Parkers got more details if you want.”
Greg didnt seem keen to stay. He got up to leave. I didnt stop him but walked him out.
“I dont even want to get married because of this. Dont trust women! And dont wreck your family over nonsense, got it?” he said before leaving.
We shook hands, and he was gone.
A heaviness settled over me. I collapsed onto the bed, thinking about lifes fragility, happiness, love. About a dream that had lived in my subconscious for years and, by some cruel twist, had come true.
My beautiful dream was like a little silver boat, rocking on an endless emerald sea under a summer sunrise. On that boat was the best girl in the worlda mystery that wouldve stayed unsolved, leaving only the weightless trace of my idealized fantasy.
Now, I said goodbye to that dream, finishing the bottle and falling asleep with it in my arms. The sea turned out to be
