“Yes, I asked for money to look after my grandchildren during the summer holidays. My pension isn’t endless!”
This year, my daughter-in-law’s mother refused to babysit the kids during the holidays. My son and his wife work all summer, so they can’t look after their sons. A vacation isn’t even on their horizon this year.
They asked my daughter-in-law’s mother if she could take in the grandkids for at least a week, but she flatly refused:
— I’m not taking on that responsibility!
The grandchildren are school-aged. What responsibility? Just feed them and let them play outside—no more trouble than that. They’re not infants needing nappies changed and to be carried all day long.
For instance, my own son grew up in a village. I used to send him to my mum’s for the holidays from a young age. Back then, all the kids were raised in the countryside while parents worked, and no one considered it a big responsibility because times were different.
Eventually, my son called me, lamenting about their impossible situation.
— They’ll end up stuck indoors all day otherwise, — he sighed.
— Well, I can take them to my place in the countryside, — I offered.
— Really? Mum, that would be a huge help.
— It’s no bother. I don’t want the grandkids cooped up inside all summer.
My daughter-in-law was naturally thrilled with my suggestion. We don’t have the best relationship, but that’s beside the point. However, I did tell my son straight away:
— You’ll need to provide funds for their upkeep because my pension isn’t limitless.
He was taken aback, as was his wife. They must’ve thought I’d be funding the kids all summer myself. Do they even know what my pension is like? It’s unreal!
— How much money do you need?
— It’s not for me, but for the grandkids. Around £1,000 each per month.
My daughter-in-law sneered. She pulled my son aside and began whispering in his ear, misjudging the distance—I heard everything.
— I’ll have to give her half my salary! — she fumed.
— And? Do you see another option?
— Maybe a camp?
— Have you checked the prices? It’d cost us both our paychecks! Besides, the kids are a bit young for camp. Mum’s not asking money for herself, but to feed and entertain the children. You know how expensive everything is now.
— Your mother could’ve asked for less. She knows we have a mortgage. And I just started back at work. It’s unreasonable.
— And your mother is reasonable? She wouldn’t even take them for a week, while mine’s offering the whole summer! — my son retorted, losing patience.
In the end, my son backed me. They provided the funds for the summer and left. My daughter-in-law had moaned about money issues, but somehow found £6,000.
We had a wonderful summer with the grandkids. They wanted for nothing. I bought sweets, toys, and even a few clothes.
Every Sunday, a man comes around selling toys from his car. Of course, I couldn’t resist buying some bits and pieces, but they do cost money.
The parents came to collect the kids at the end of August. And you know what’s the most interesting part? My daughter-in-law decided I should provide an expense report on where the money went.
— Sorry, dear, but I didn’t keep track of every purchase.
— Well, since you asked for money, there should be a report. How do I know you didn’t spend it all on yourself? — she snapped.
— Is that what you think of me?
— I just don’t see how you could spend £2,000 a month if you have home-grown produce. There aren’t many amusements at the cottage. Shove a cucumber in their mouth and send them off to play, while the money goes in your pocket!
— How can you talk like that? Did you even ask what the kids ate all this time? Not a day without meat! And we went into town nearly every weekend for funfair rides, which aren’t cheap.
— I just don’t believe you spent every penny.
— Even my pension got used, if you’re curious. You could ask the kids what I bought them, but I don’t have receipts—I would have kept them if I’d known!
I wish my son had heard all this. I didn’t want to drag him into the conflict as it would surely cause a row with his wife.
My daughter-in-law scrutinizes every expense, thinking I made off with their money. I could’ve just not taken any, and then the kids would’ve been munching cucumbers and getting ice cream once a week. Is that the kind of holiday she wanted? We’ll give her that next year.
