A man walked into his home and was stunned…
Six months ago, he had been given a tiny kitten named Bullet. His niece, who would sometimes visit him with her family, found the little one on the street. As she handed the kitten over, she said, “You live alone and still haven’t found a partner. Your job is stressful, driving a bus all day. When you come home, this little one will be waiting for you. Cats bring warmth and calm to a home…”
Well, he believed her. Why not? Coming home after dealing with passengers and drivers who refuse to give way, there’s something comforting about a cat lounging peacefully on the sofa. It’d meow and purr, climb onto your lap, craving affection.
Of course, ladies and gentlemen, he thought this because he was inexperienced. The kitten did not meet his expectations. The obedient and sweet little kitten turned into a mischievous teenager. It didn’t enjoy sitting on laps or being petted but loved to play around!
In his inexperience, the man bought a fly swatter for tackling flies—those tiny, nimble ones or the giant ones, inexplicably called ‘horseflies.’ Bullet keenly observed the man swatting flies, perhaps gathering information. One day, the feline decided to please its human. And it did…
So, let’s go back to the moment we started with.
***
The man walked into his home and gasped. Nothing! Absolutely nothing remained upright in his apartment. The scene was as if two gangs had staged a brawl with bats right in his living room! Chairs were overturned. Vases, glasses, and anything that had been on the tables, windowsills, and cabinets now lay shattered on the floor, glass, clay, and plastic shards evenly spread about.
The curtains resembled the tattered skirt of a fashion-forward young lady, and in the kitchen… Ketchup dripped into a mix of salted tomatoes and jam. Neat little piles of salt, sugar, and pepper lay scattered. Forks and spoons were strewn about. In the midst of the chaos, the curtains, torn down with rods, lay in disarray, and on the eerily empty dining table…
A very contented Bullet sat, with a fly before him. Huge, like an airplane. Bullet looked at the man with a victorious gaze and purred contently.
Now, surely! Surely, the man would praise him. All day, tirelessly and with tremendous effort, he had chased that impudent fly throughout the apartment. Utterly exhausted, yet he caught it! And now, he could present it and claim a well-deserved reward.
Filled with such pleasant thoughts, Bullet began to knead with his paws.
The man picked up a chair and sat down. He didn’t know what to do first—clean up, have dinner, or scold Bullet—but he didn’t have long to ponder as the doorbell rang. Rising, he walked to the hallway and opened the door. And his astonishment grew even greater.
Standing in the corridor were three police officers, with about ten neighbors behind them. The officers had their hands resting on their gun handles.
“We received a call…” one of them began.
“Several,” added another. “They said something very bad is happening in your apartment. Furniture is falling, dishes are breaking. There’s terrifying screeching and howling. Could we come in and check that everything is alright? And you… just to be safe… please raise your hands, cross them on your head, and step to the far corner of the room.”
The neighbors looked at the man with fear and judgment.
“Ah… I see,” the man said. He continued, “Please, come in!”
He stepped into the far corner of the room, arms crossed on his head.
The officers moved through the apartment, witnessing the wreckage and searching from room to room.
“What are you looking for?” the man inquired.
“A body,” one officer replied. “And your explanation of the events.”
“Oh, the body! I’ll show you the body now,” the man agreed.
The officers instantly became alert and placed their hands on their weapon grips. Carefully, with slow movements, the man went to the kitchen. He opened the door wide with a flourish. “Please!” he said. “Here’s the body.”
The officers pushed him aside and crowded into the kitchen.
The little body sat on the table, grinning cheekily, enjoying the attention. In front of him lay the fly.
There were several seconds of silence as the officers recovered, glancing around. Then, realization dawned upon them. The first officer who started laughing was the one who had begun the conversation, and soon everyone joined in.
They laughed uncontrollably while Bullet looked triumphantly at them and his human, as if to say, “See? Everyone’s happy. My efforts weren’t in vain!”
Then the officers spent half an hour taking photos with the fly and Bullet, against the backdrop of the mayhem he caused. Everyone was laughing and thoroughly satisfied, especially the cat. Naturally! His efforts had been duly appreciated.
***
Once the police and neighbors left, the man sat back down.
“I’ll help you,” he heard a voice and turned.
A woman from the first floor stood there.
“Today’s my day off,” she said with a smile. “You’d be here until midnight by yourself, but together we’ll clean up in no time.”
“It feels awkward imposing on you,” the man said, embarrassed.
“Not at all!” she smiled back. “It’s fine. I didn’t have anything to do anyway. I’m alone. There’s just my mom. She lives nearby. Will you be punishing this little rascal, or at least scolding him?” she asked, nodding at Bullet.
Bullet sat on the kitchen table, batting at a hefty fly with his right paw.
“Well, scold… I’ll do it now…” the man sighed. He reached for Bullet, picked him up: “You little rascal! Should you be doing this? No, you shouldn’t.”
Bullet kneaded his paws—the man was scolding him. So lovingly and gently that he couldn’t resist and reached up to lick his human’s left cheek, while the man… kissed him on the nose.
“Alright, good. Well done,” he said to Bullet. “So you do understand. Don’t let it happen again.”
And he set the cat down on the floor. Bullet lifted his tail high and went to rub against the woman’s legs. She laughed.
“What a charming scolding,” she chuckled. “How come I never noticed you before?”
“I don’t know,” answered the man. “Maybe because I used to be unhappy, but now, since Bullet came along, there’s plenty of happiness.”
And he gestured at the chaos the cat had created.
The woman called a handyman she knew, and the next day, a sturdy mesh was installed on all the windows. Bullet could now comfortably lounge on the windowsill and gaze at birds and large, plump flies.
The man and woman tidied up, disposed of all the broken crockery, washed the floors, and removed the torn curtains. Then, they went shopping for replacements.
They returned in the evening, the man had bought snacks, a delicious cake, and a bottle of champagne. You understand, ladies and gentlemen. To celebrate the new beginnings. In the old apartment. Together with the woman.
They sat at the kitchen table, eating, drinking, and talking. Life felt good; especially Bullet, who lay on the woman’s lap, plotting… new help for his human dad.
***
In the end, everything turned out splendidly. And of course, Bullet is enthusiastically helping the two of them—dad and his new mum. Who entered their lives solely because she found him, Bullet, and recognized her very own kitty in him.
Now, dad and mum deal with the aftermath of his antics together.
What do you think about that? How else could it have ended?
It simply couldn’t have ended any other way…
